Where do you find a baby with no arms or legs? Where you left it.

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What did Washington say to his men before they got into the boat? Men, get in the boat!

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What do you call a black man who is great at basketball? An all-star

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What did the priest say to the little boy? "Reading antijokes in rapid succession takes almost all humor from them."

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Barney is a pedophile Loves dino molestation Stuck a dildo in his ass And died of constipation

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What happened to timmy? He had downsyndrome and walked off a cliff

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What's up with airplane food? Well I am a big fan of peanuts, so nothing

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Why did the little girl fall off the swing? Because at the climax point in the swing, gravity is making a much larger affect on you because you are pulling farther away from the earth as well as positioning your body in a way where it is awkward and unstable to support your body, which greatly increases the chance of you falling off and landing on the ground.

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An oriental man starts a new job. He is told to go to the Supply cupboard and bring back some stationery.He is gone far too long so his boss sends another man to see what is going on. The oriental man had a fatal stroke in the supply cupboard and was unfortunately dead.

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Why does Timmy Teblow love penis? Logan Cole made him do it.

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Let me tell you a story kids about Bill. Now bill seemed like any ordinary guy, he had a job a wife kids and he even coached the little league baseball team for boys. Well he had all the kids come to his house to celebrate the championships,they won, and he accidentally killed a kid while trying to hit a pinata. He had to kill the rest of the children to hide evidence so he killed them all quick and buried them in a 6ft. hole in his basement where they lay for 9 years today.

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What do you call a room with an oven and ten Jews in it? A kitchen.

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Why did the little girl fall off the swings? Because she had no arms or legs.

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why did the boy die because he got ran over by a tractor

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Did you hear about the little girl who got a bike for her birthday? Shes dying of Terminal Cancer

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A man walks into his doctor's office He says: ''Doctor, I have said goodbeye to my family and friends and I have decided to take the pills you offered me and die peacefully in my sleep, I won't suffer any longer from my disease''. The doctor answers: ''You are in luck, we still have a few of them left''

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Jeff comes home from a long day at work. As a result he is very tired. So, he decides to go to bed.

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How long would it take for a clock to reach 12 It depends on which 12 it is going to land on and which time zone you are in but yet most clocks are not correct so it is very hard to tell

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"Whats your favorite number?" "9." "Is it because thats your jersey number." "Thats my jersey number?"

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Why does Charlie Sheen do cocaine? Because his father was a poor role model and he's an unstable celebrity.

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Yo mama's so fat, that when she jumped, gravity pushed her back to the floor!

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Why was the user KyuremCult's name blacklisted on iFunny? She had been repeatedly banraided by people with no success, but because of the mass reports and the leading to some of her works being deleted, the system decided to blacklist her name from search.

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People Eating Tasty Animals

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What do you call a person that is green, wearing plaid, and standing next to you in the elevator? What ever their name is

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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