Why couldn't billy hear his mom on the phone? Because Billy is deaf.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Why did Michael Jackson name his kid blanket? Because after years of drug abuse and sexual insecurity led to him thinking unrealistically during the birth of his children.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

1912, the titanic sinks, 1913 ww1 starts, 1939, ww2 starts, 1954, the vietnam war starts, 90's, cold war. wow! the 20th century sucked.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

was gonna write a really funny "anti-joke" about two dogs and some spagetti but decided instead to tell you about how hard my life is and how much i hate getting up in the morning and just keep you wondering about the spaggetti and the dogs while i kill myself and it all a sudden makes sense as the two dogs are eating my shattered brain that looks like spaggetti wich leaves me wondering , am i spelling spaggetti right?

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Why did the chicken cross the road? He felt like crossing roads that day.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

an atheist and a christian meet in a bar they chat about football, order some pints, and have a really good night.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Why was the boy crying? Because he had a frog stapled to his face.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Why did the chicken cross the road? There I no road.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

What's blue and says "Good morning" A blue sign that says good morning

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Whats the difference between a sack of babies and a sandwich? A Sand which floats when you put it into a large body of water.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Once upon a time there was a man exercising, he pulled a muscle and had to have his heart removed. In other words, don't exercise. The end.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

How to condom style ayyyyyy sexy horsey how how how how how to condom style

thumb_up thumb_down +22

"Hey, why won't you let me through?" "These tickets are fake." "No they aren't. LOOK OVER THERE!" The guard turns around, and then turns back. Minorly inconvenienced, he arrests the man immediately, upon which he is sent to jail and anally raped multiple times.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

What do you call white trash Garbage

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Why did the chicken cross the road? Um...thats impossible because chickens live on farms theyre are no roads....

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Why did the cookie die Because a fat kid was hungry

thumb_up thumb_down +22

roses are red violets are blue tis poem makes no sense so screw you

thumb_up thumb_down +20

what happened to the baseball player who couldnt throw? he was very unsuccessful, as throwing is the most important skill of the game

thumb_up thumb_down +20

We got him in about five minutes, the kid will already be exhausted by the point we get to him, r rather, he gets to us. Pretty quick for a small geek I got to say, the photography we got of him is an obvious Photoshop, but he seems similar enough I guess. I would call, but it seems someone has been messing with all other "Erron`s" homes and phones if I had not dropped mine, I would not have noticed we have been bugged for a while, pretty professional gear too,

thumb_up thumb_down +20

LO LLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOOPLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOOLLOLOLOLOLOLOLOOO O O O O O O OLO LOL OL O LO LO LO L OL O LO LO L OL O LO L OL O LO LO L OL OL O LO LO L OL OL OL O LO L OL OL O L OL OLLOLOLLOL OL O LO LO L OL OL O

thumb_up thumb_down +20

Why did children rejoice when Michael Jackson died? Because they were at a birthday party, and only heard about his death afterward.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

What do you call a lesbian with a penis? Justin Bieber.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

How can you tell Santa is racist? He doesn't give Africans presents.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

Roses are dead. Violets are dead. I'm a bad gardener.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops