Little Johnny is sleeping overnight at a school camping trip. The teacher goes around to check tents to make sure everybody is falling asleep fine. Little Johnny, however, says, "Miss, I am scared of the dark. Can I sleep in your tent instead?" The teacher reluctantly agrees, finishes checking around and brings Little Johnny to her tent. "Miss, can I play with your belly button with my finger? My mommy lets me", asks little Johnny. The teacher reluctantly agrees. Suddenly, the teacher jumps up. "THAT WASN'T MY BELLY BUTTON!", she shouts. "Yeah," says Little Johnny. "Well that wasn't my finger, either."

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Why do blonde girls like penis? Because it tastes good

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Why did the baby die, because he got herpes, so did his mother, there both dead now.

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hey im leon and i love the chuckie

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what's pink and fluffy? pink fluff

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A man calls his 23 year old nephew on a Saturday night. He's calling him, in order to apologise for molesting him when he was younger. As he could no longer live with the guilt and shame. They both start to cry on the phone. The nephew hangs up " I can't do this.." The man receives an email from his boss, saying " Lisa told me she's still waiting for your analysis on the new federal cuts and how they're going to affect us. Please send them asap."

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He was in a van headed to the slaughterhouse.

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Three Arabian men are on a plane, they stand up, and shout BOMB, BOMB, BOMB! All three have Tourettes.

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Your mammas so fat, she weighs significantly more than the average person.

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How many dead babies does it take to paint a wall? Depends. How hard can you throw?

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Roses are red,Lemons are sour,Open your legs and give me an hour.

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How do you know when a ghost is lying? I don't know because I've never met one, so from personal experience I couldn't tell you.

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What did the oncologist say to his patient? You have terminal cancer.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Well why wouldn't it?

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What is worse than a dead baby nailed to a tree? Obama

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Who is big and stupid My brother

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Why'd the chicken cross the road? To visit the graves of his wife and only daughter who were killed in a car accident at the fault of a drunk driver many years prior.

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knock knock? who's there? ted? ted who? stop f***ing around, you got cancer.

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knock, knock... no one replies and it becomes obvious that no one is in the house.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? I don't know, as I wasn't there, and frankly I wonder why a chicken was anywhere near a road anyway

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What do a watermelon and a bunny have in common? they are both green except the bunny

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Why did the chicken cross the road? I don't know.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Cher. Cher who? Just Cher.

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Q: What's the capital of Ohio A: O

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops