How do you make an electrician cry? You cut off his friend's penis.

varför skriver jag på svenska jag vet inte

knock knock who's there no one

Why did the hipster burn his mouth? He ate the mac and cheese before it was cool.

Why's Jeds head so big? Curley wurly.

Your boat breaks down on the highway. How many squirrels does it take to eat a bannana? Squirrels do not eat bannanas but it would probably take a monkey 1.5 milliseconds.

Did u hear what happened to that man with no arms and no legs who tried to play water polo? No, what happened He drowned....

Why couldn't the mexican feed his family? Because a large percent of mexican immigrants in the United States do not have jobs due to dicrimination against illegal immigrants crossing the soutern border, thus rendering them more vunerable to unemployment is that is vastly present in the United States.

What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? A Jew is a person who adheres to the Jewish faith and claims a cultural or ancestral connection to the Jewish people, and a pizza is an oven-baked, flat, disc shaped bread usually topped with tomato sauce and mozzarella and then a selection of meats, depending on taste and culture.

What do you call a black person on a bike? A cyclist.

How Many Blondes does it take to open a fridge. 1 Because most blondes are smart and can open fridges.

What's the difference between a baby and a watermelon? One's fun to hit with a sledgehammer, the other one's a watermelon.

"Free to play" Play free "right now"

Your mom is so fat, it is unlikely that she will be able to survive the month without experimental liposuction and heart surgery, and even then her outlook is bleak. I am so sorry.

Q:John has 50 candy bars and he eats 45, what does john have? A: Diabetes

How do you call a man in a wheelchair? Disabled.

What do you call a kid with one arm and an eye-patch? Names.

poop

Who killed the ears of every human being? -Rebecca Black

69

What's fat, round and bounces on the ground? A ball. I lied about the fat bit.

Knock Knock Who's there The military. We're under attack. The military we're under attack who? Dinos

Roses are Red Violets are Blue I have AIDS we're dying together

What is red, blue, green, and pink, tie died, and alive? Nothing.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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