a horse nibbled a baby

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Always put punctuation at the end of your sentence

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A man had a blue hat, a yellow hat and a red hat. This man has three hats.

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You know what's really long? The bread lines in Africa

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Roses are red Violets are blue Daises are yellow Azeleas are pinkish purple

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Two penguins are sitting on an ice flow. One says to the other: "hey--you know, it looks like you are wearing a tuxedo." The other one says, "who says I'm not?"

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What do you call a fat kid? I don't know...you tell me

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roses are blue violets are red... i have to use the bathroom

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9

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What did the scientist call a spider? An arachnid.

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A Black man and a racist walk into a bar. There was a ruckus.

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what do you call a nun in a wheel chair? Virgin Mobile By: jb lshs

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The king has three daughters. One day, one of the daughters comes into his room and asks, "Father, why is my name Rose?" King replies,"well, a rose petal fell on your head when you were a baby." The next day, the second daughter comes into his room and asks,"Father, why is my name Tulip?" the king replies,"A tulip fell on your head when you were a bay." On the next day, the final daughter comes in and says, "BLAJSFUAGHASRAKKKKKK." The king says,"Shut up, Cinderblock."

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Knock knock. Who's there? Pete. I'm here to tell you that your entire family just died in a car accident.

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Yo Mama is so old that she is probably unable to become pregnant.

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What do you call something thats mostly made of wood, big, round and stupid A retarded version of the Knights of the round table

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What happened to jimmy when he stepped on a rusty nail? He died of of tetanus.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Orange. Orange who? The orange that can talk and knock on doors.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Eating the worm

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If a chicken and a half layed an egg and a half in a day and a half how many pancakes does it take to shingle a roof? -A banana has no bones

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Wanna hear a funny joke? Sure. Me too, do you have any?

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'Peter Piper picked a peck of pickled peppers.' Thats fantastic for Peter Piper

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Roses are red, violets are blue God made me beautiful, how about you?

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Knock knock. MAN: Who's there? HOOKER: The hooker you called for. MAN: Oh, dear lord. My wife hasn't left yet. I need you to come back in fifteen minutes. WIFE: Honey, who is it? MAN: It's the hooker I called for, but you haven't left. I told her to come back in fifteen minutes.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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