how many babies does it take to paint a barn? depends on how hard you can throw them

thumb_up thumb_down

Why did the little boy cry? Because he stuck his finger into a blender

thumb_up thumb_down

A woman walked into a bar. She dragged her drunk husband off his stool and left.

thumb_up thumb_down

You shouldn't have expectations. They make ex out of pect and tations.

thumb_up thumb_down

An Atheist sneezed. Everyone around him said, "God bless you." He thanked them and continued on with his day.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Guy 1: "hey look that homeless guy is riding a bike!" Guy 2 " Ya i know and look, there's a dead pro biker other there"

thumb_up thumb_down -2

An irish man walks out of a bar

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Yo mamas so fat she's over weight

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Knock, knock. Who's there? HIVs.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

whats brown and smells like poop? poop.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Where did Sheyanne go during the bombing...... Everywhere

thumb_up thumb_down -2

knock knock who's there greg greg who greg is crying because his grandma dementia made her forgot all about him

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Guess what I saw... Wood, I'm a carpenter.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Ed Rambo. EXPERIENCE as John Rambo is kidnapped by AL QUAIDA (because he did not totally save their ass in the second or third movie riiiight) Leaving Ed Rambo, his son (Played by Eddie Murphy) up to the task of saving him, from Al Quaida`s real leader... Yes, its a conspiracy! "Okay, first Obama is supposedly a terrorist, but seriously the secret alliance between Donald Trump and Hillary Clinton?" Bullshit movie reviews. "So the explanation is that Ed Rambo is black because John Rambo married an Asian woman? What about their age? They are probably the same or something!" Mad Magazine. Moral: Yeah because this annoys you, and you all kinda love me I know its Al Qaeda, but who wants to type that... Now it does not say Skynet is watching anymore... After four times... Wow, god damn we need robocop to be real before the Termitetrisnators travel back in time into our dimension. AND NOT ADAM SANDLERS: ROBOCOP.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

What do you call a big group of Chinese people on Mars? An extraordinary feat for the Chinese space program and a historic day in human history, where a particular country has set up the first human colony on another planet and we have proven to ourselves that our race is capable of interplanetary travel and can accomplish anything if we set our minds to it.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

<!-- alert('I lost the game'); -->

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it wanted to.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Is worse than biting into an apple and finding a worm? Getting AIDS.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

who is gay for wild ones- Ryan Mcgggguigan

thumb_up thumb_down -2

What happens when someone with ADD tells a joke? I forgot.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

What do you call a black person flying a plane? A pilot

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Bob goes swimming in the ocean. Due to the fact that his father sexually abused him as a child, and never taught him how to swim, he drowns.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

your social life.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Did you hear about the man who thought his wife was trying to kill him? He's dead.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops