I knocked on my neighbors door to complain about the horrible smell before remembering I killed him the week before, he has no family and no one will ever know.

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Michael Jackson walks into a bar No he doesn't. He's dead.

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Womens rights.

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Whats worse than stubbing your toe? The Holocaust.

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Where do farmers retire their used farm equipment? The tree in their backyard.

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What do you call a black guy who flys a plane? A pilot.

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Anti-Joke is a silver bullet.

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Why was little Jimmy sad? Multiple complications including broken bones, a fractured skull, liver disease, and the fact that all his family had been gassed by the Nazis.

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Why did the boy punch a little kid in the face? Because he was a bully and liked to feel superior.

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Why did the retarded guy follow the 7 year old? Because he's a stalker.

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What did the penguin wearing a blue sweater say to the sink? I am a penguin wearing a blue sweater.

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Why did the man commit suicide? Because all meaning in his life were gone.

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What did the man get on his birthday the week before he died? Obamacare

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Q: how many oxen does it take to row up the empire state building in half of a green canoe under the purple sun while eating a dead moose with no arms? A: Purple, because snakes have no elbows.

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Knock Knock, Who's there? Alzheimer's Alzheimer's who? Knock Knock...

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How do you piss off a teacher? Accuse them of being a pedophile

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A black man is running down the street with a purse in his hand. He was trying to catch up to the old woman who forgot it at the restaurant. She was very grateful.

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Why did the booger throw a fit? Because it was getting picked on.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Orange ya glad i didn't say banana

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Q:Who has the highest K/D ratio in Call of Duty World at War A: Hitler, 6000000/1

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When life gives you lemons, Life isn't actually a person so saying that would be irrelevant

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what meows and is fuzzy and smells like manure? a cat being being killed with a chainsaw next to a cow

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a man walks into a bar he has a few drinks and announces to his friends that hes driving home, dave (one of his friends) tells him that its a bad idea and takes his keys off of him until the next day.

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Two men are fighting in a boxing match. One gets punched in the crouch, cries, and goes home to watch "The Simpsons".

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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