A pirate walks in to a bar. The bartender notices he has a steering wheel in the front of his pants, so he says to the pirate, "you know you've got a steering wheel in your pants, huh?" The pirate responds, "Arrrrrrrrr, it's for me carrrrr."

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Why was the man dress in a suit ? He had a job

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Hey man, you the tall one! Yes? Do you understand me? No. But you do overstand me right? Yeah, I overstand most people.

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What's worse than a dead baby? A dumpster full of dead babies What's worse than that? One is still alive at the bottom What's worse than that? It had to eat its way out. What's worse than that? It came back for seconds

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How many kids does it take to get a day off of school? ...26

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Why couldn't the black man get out of jail? He couldn't post his bond.

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How many kids with ADD does it take to screw in a lightbulb Wanna go ride bikes?

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 brutally murdered 6's entire family.

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What do you get when you cross a gay man with a chainsaw? A decapitated homosexual.

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A fat man walks into a gym, and comes out fatter

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Jimmy's mom: Jimmy go do your chores now!! Jimmy: You shut your mouth, whore. Get your smelly ass back in the kitchen!!!

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What's disabled and red all over. The kid I hit with my car.

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What's worse than aids? Being a virgin.

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Knock knock. Who's there? The bailiffs, we have come to take your house

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What does a black kid get for Christmas? Your bike

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i just cant stand up to cripple jokes

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Q: Why did Sally keep falling off the swing? A: She had no arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Sally.

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Roses are red, violets blue, um... that's all i got.

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What did John say to Tim Hi I'm John

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roses are red violets are blue you smell like poo I F*****G HATE YOU!

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what has two legs, and is red? half a cat.

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Ask me if I'm a tree "are you a tree?" No

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Roses are red Violets are blue Some poems rhyme But this one doesn't.

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Me: "If I had Alzheimers, I would break down into tears." Friend: "Why, you would forget why you were crying..." Me: "Who are you again?"

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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