How many Cancer patients does it take to screw in a lightbulb? One. Cancer does not affect one's ability to install light bulbs.

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Why did two girls need one cup? they didnt feel like washing an extra dish to drink their coca cola

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What did John say to Tim Hi I'm John

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I dyed my armpit hair blue yesterday because I wanted to start a new trend. My boyfriend later broke up with me.

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What's black and white and red all over? A greyish red object.

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A black guy and a Mexican are in a car, who is driving? They take turns due to the fact it is a long trip.

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what do you get when a white man and a black woman have a baby? A baby

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What does a black kid get for Christmas? Your bike

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Stop driving smart cars you fags

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I'm schizophrenic and so am I. I also happen suffer from multiple personality disorder. Schizophrenia refers to separation of mental functions, manifesting in anti-social behavior and delusions, and is unrelated to the separate disorder of dissociative identity disorder, popularly known as multiple personality disorder, characterized by at least two distinct and enduring identities and dissociated personality states. Both are crippling to normal behavior and function due to lack of public awareness and funding. Now get out of our ghost train or we'll cut you.

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whats on object, almost tube like that squirts thick white liquid from the top elmer's glue

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Why did the pumpkin when orange is not a letter in Spanish? Because moon shoes are der milf

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a man walks into a bar... he was shot to death because he was a slave during the 1910s

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Your momma is so dumb that her IQ is 3 standard deviations below that of an average person.

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What did the cricket say to the fox? Cricket.

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How do u get suzzy off a swing? You tell her to get off

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Why did the midget cross the road? He needed to buy a ladder

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Michael Brown

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Q:Why couldn't the man lick his ice cream? A: Because he lost all of his tongue due to the chemicals of cigarettes.

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Knock knock Who's there? Cow Cow who? If you really think about it, it's really now

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Why did the chicken get hit by a bus? He tried to cross the road.

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Why can't you hear a pterodactyl go to the bathroom? Because they're extinct.

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Knock Knock! Who is there? Me. Let me in. Oh, okay, Come in.

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Why was it cold in Florida on Monday? Because there was an irregular cold front moving through. The Monday part was just a coincidence.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops