What did the farmer say after the chicken started talking? Holy shit a talking chicken

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How many black basketball players does it take to change a lightbulb? One. They're all rather tall therefore they can reach the light source with ease.

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What's grammatically incorrect about this sentence? Nothing. I lied.

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What do you get when you cross a Lion and a Shark? You would likely get trouble, seeing as its both animals are quite dangerous and crossing even one of them is ill advised.

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How do you make a lumberjack cry? Kill his family

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Q: How do you make a fireman cry?? A: Drown his wife

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“When life gives you lemons, don’t make lemonade. Make life take the lemons back! Get mad! I don’t want your damn lemons, what the hell am I supposed to do with these? Demand to see life’s manager! Make life rue the day it thought it could give Cave Johnson lemons! Do you know who I am? I’m the man who’s gonna burn your house down! With the lemons! I’m gonna get my engineers to invent a combustible lemon that burns your house down!”

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What is pink and stuffy? Pink stuff

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How do you take a picture of a man with a wooden leg? You can't take pictures with wooden legs.

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What's red and bad for your teeth? A brick.

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Who didnt visit the orphanage this year? Mom...

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So there was this kid who was sitting on a stool, and the stool started moving. He then realized that stools do not move, so he got up and ran away as quickly as he could.

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Roses are black, Violets are black, Everything's black, Oh wait... I'm blind.

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What's funny about four black guys driving off a cliff in a Cadillac? They were my friends...

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My friend is a famous actor. Fooled you! I have no friends.

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what did the black guy say to the white guy? black guy: hello how are you doing white guy: good i guess.... just heard they shut down KFC black guy: that sucks

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What's the difference between a pile of dead babies and a ferarri? I don't have a ferarri in my garage.

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What did the deaf blonde say to the brunette? Nothing.

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Billy and Joseph are playing Rock paper scissors. Billy says paper. Joseph proceeds to throw a rock as hard as he can at Billys face and sends him to the emergency room where he was later diagnosed with terminal testicular cancer.

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Shelly tells Rob to go home... Thats what she said

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I suck at poetry, Show me your tits.

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why was the boy sad his whole family just died in a plane crash

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what is the opposite of underpants? overpants

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How do you make a clown shut up? Throw a axe at it!!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops