Why did the man ask the woman on a date? They were both single and looking for a unique, romantic experience that could possibly turn into a long-term loving relationship.

A man walks into a bar. The bartender asks what he'd like to drink. The man pulls out his gun, shoots the surprised bartender, and proceeds to execute all the patrons of the bar and finally commit suicide. A post-mortem identification of the man identifies him as a victim of childhood sexual abuse and a diagnosed schizophrenic. There is a nice funeral for all the victims and the media respectfully minimizes exposure of the event.

You are joking right?

Tifa my ass, if that is your name buddy, then I am Nicholas Cage, or why do you not just call me Cloud Strife? Seriously, if you are a guy just say it and get lost, I will still honor my agreement and show up and see what I can do for your little order though, you pay the trip and the stay of course.

Three bitches walk into a bar, and die

Did you know that there is a species of rodent capable of jumping higher than an average three-story building? This is due to its muscular hind legs and the fact that the average three-story building cannot jump.

Rarity: "So, what is that splendid frock of yours saying?" Maud Pie: "It doesn't talk. It's a dress."

What's the difference between a duck? They are mostly the same, only one leg is shorter.

Q: What race was Jesus Christ? A: None, he's not real

i think dylan is turnimg gay for amy

Why didn't the skeleton go to his party? Because he used to be alive and was burned to death by an overturned truck carrying chemical's so his family canceled the party to organise the funeral.

Why don't some black men have jobs? Because they won't work

Roses are red. Violets are violet.

What is stupid and looks like you? You.

Why did the girl fall off the swing? She had no arms. Why couldn't she get back up? She had no legs.

How do you make a fat man cry? You call him fat.

Two rolls are hanging on a wall..... On falls down and the other ones name is Erwin

He is outside, running for it, Erron, seriously who is We? I thought you where an author.

What does a dog in a microwave look like? You tell me, I normally close my eyes when I masturbate ?_?

What is white and hard to catch? A refrigerator

Why couldn'nt Sally swing on the swing? Because Sally was a carrot

*Dubstep* CHEW CHEW CHEW CHEW CHEW BWAB BWAB

Q: What do you call a black person living in the United States? A: An African American.

Jennifer Kim... having a boyfriend!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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