Q: I have a bed, but never sleep, I have a mouth, but never speak. What am I? A: Stephen Hawking

whats the difference between a dead dog and a dead black guy on the road? there is skid marks leading up to the dog.

Joseph Coney could die... or worse... he could do anything but that....

What's the most common way to become mentally challenged? Getting hit by a shovel a couple times

What did the boy with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? Nothing, because he is an orphan.

My house is on fire I'll probably die posting this joke

What do you call 20 blondes in a freezer? dinner

Q: What do you call a black man that's flying a plane? A: A pilot.

I wondered why the piano was getting bigger. Then it hit me... I'm sorry I have visual agnosia

CHAD'S A FAG!!!

Why did the bus driver tell the black man to get to the back of the bus? Because all the seats up front were full and its dangerous to stand in a moving vehicle

What do you call a plane going to Africa with 100 black people on it? A plane, the contents of the plane is irrelevant...

Your uncle jack just helped you off a horse. Now it's your turn to help your uncle jack off a horse.

Why did the kid lose his nose? because his brother chopped it off with an axe.

Q. Why were the children sad? A. They'd just been abducted by a dodgy old man in a van.

Knock Knock Who's there? You know you really should have a safer way of finding out who is really on the other side. Now a days it's just not safe to ask, "who's there". I mean it could have been, Milkman, Plummer, or worst a Land Shark!

Why was the little boys mom watching tv in the living room? Better question why is she out of the kitchen.

Chose to describe yourself: Green thumb: Tall wealthy, good looking, intelligent man with a model wife, a ferrari expensivo, a hotel just for yourself. Red thumb: A below average piece of shit? Green thumb? Dont lie to me you piece of sh*t!

have you seen stevie wonder's house. no? Well nethier has he you

What day is it today? Today. Thank you. You're welcome.

How does a black guy in debt make money fast at the bank? He applies for a loan and conscientiously works hard to pay off the loan in turn, which he was lucky enough to get at a low interest rate.

yo mama just like a toilet, white and full of crap!

what do you get when you combine sodium and hydroxide? sodium-hydroxide

A farmer hears a knock at the door on a rainy night. He opens the door and welcomes an attractive young man in. The farmer gets his budding teenage daughter to fetch the man a towel. He dries himself off, thanks them both, and goes to bed. He's gone before anyone else wakes up and leaves a fifty on the table.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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