knock knock who's there? john john who? john opens his mouth only to be gunned down by a terrorist attack

Why did the chicken cross the road? It was commiting suicide

a cat gets mauled by a dog. it died later that day

Q. What happened to the man that kept an open hand? A. He is in jail because he beat his family

Where does a successful black person live? Neverland.

Why do giraffes have long necks? So they can reach higher, un-eaten leaves.

what did the doctor say to another doctor? we are doctors

Why did the guy stay up all night on the internet? because hes a fat ugly bastard with no life

Your mother is so fat, she is at great risk for developing diabetes mellitus type 2.

A little boy had a candle by his bedside. It fell over. The candle was fake, and it didn't burn down his house. When he woke up, he picked up the candle, put it back on his nightstand and had a wonderful day.

Why did the baby cross the road? It was stapled to the chicken.

Here is a nursery rhyme: Jane is a scruff, she has a head full of nits. She also had pain in her great big... Now don't get excited. Don't be mislead. Because all that Jane had was a pain in her head!

Why did the little boy fall down the stairs? I pushed 'em.

everyone lies especially if they said agree to terms of service

An american, canadian, and mexican are on a skyscraper. Canadian: (pulls off maple leaf) we have to many of these in our country (throws off building) Mexican: (pulls out burrito) we have to many of these in our country (throws off building) American: (looks at mexican) we have to many of these in our country (pushes mexican off building)

What do you get if you cross a bomb expert, and a homophobe a blow job

You know what's funnier than a pile of dead babies? A pile where one's alive in the middle, and has to eat his way out.

It was a chilly saturday afternoon coles's brother asked cole to baby sit cole said yes and when his brother left cole proceeded to give it to his niece in the ass. Little did cole know he said his little niece on fire that was the end of his little nieces life.

Two condoms walk into a gay bar. The people in the bar are perplexed that two inanimate objects are capable of locomotion.

Q - What's the difference between a Park Bench and a Black Man ? A - The Park Bench can support a family.

A blonde, a brunette, and a red head walk into a bar. It is a coincidence that none of them have the same hair colour.

Chuck Norris was so good at karate that he held the middle weight world title for 6 years and was named fighter of the year by Black Belt Magazine. He also used his talents to start a successful acting and advertising career.

A Jew walks into a bar. It's a bar full of Neo-Nazis.

What's worse than catching aids? - already having aids.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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