- Anti Joke

Dude, you were so drunk last night that you got in a terrible car accident, and now you are paralyzed from the waste down for life.

Yo mama so fat that she probably has a thyroid problem.

'Knock Knock' "Who's there?" 'Nobody. Your schizophrenia has become so bad you can barely make it through a normal day without emotionally collapsing. Your social life has dissolved into a world of fear, and your personal relationships have crumbled away before your eyes. Major depression and anxiety are eating you away. You have nothing left.'

What is the similarity between John W. Booth and Pee Wee Herman? They both got arrested for shooting someone in the back of the head in the theater.

How do you entertain a bored pharaoh? (written in 1600 BCE - Westcar Papyrus) -You sail a boatload of young women dressed only in fishing nets down the Nile and urge the pharaoh to go catch a fish

wheres an unexpected place to find sand? a human pancreas.

America's Got Talent WIN! Britian's Got Talent WIN! Mexico's Got Talent WTF!

Why did the chicken cross the road I don't know

I had vodka + water and got drunk. had rum + water and got drunk. had gin and water and still got drunk. I've learnt my lesson. NO MORE WATER FOR ME

Q) How do you kill a blue elephant? A) Shoot it with a blue elephant gun. Q) How do you kill a pink elephant? A) Hold its trunk until it turns blue, then shoot it with a blue elephant gun. Q) How do you kill a white elephant? A) Tickle it until it turns pink, hold its trunk until it turns blue, then shoot it with a blue elephant gun.

What is the worst thing to say to a dying person? After you die I'm going to defile your corpse, nan.

what do u call a kid at school a school kid and i have enough of these anti jokes they are not funny

What do you call a horse with two legs? A kangaroo

What's funnier than ten dead babies nailed to one tree? Nothing, infant mortality is not a laughing matter.

Why is 6 so afraid of 7? Because 7 was a registered six offender.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

Want more? You might be interested in...

Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops

A rabbi and a priest walk into a bar. The rabbi says "ow my head"

What's stupid a light bulb.

Why is six afraid of seven? SE7EN!

Knock Knock Who's there? Tank tank who? You're welcome

Tony Romo

Have you ever had Ethiopian food? ...Neither have they.

How do you wake a clown up? By pouring vinegar in his eyes.