If your falling up a ladder and your canoe runs out of gas, how many pancakes does it take to cover a dog houes? A. George Washington B. India C. Blue Answer: False

What is exceptionally dangerous? Shaving while taking a bath, because the risk of electrocution is extremely high.

Hey babe, do you like video games, movies, mystery books, philosophy, walking in the park, going to the gym, riding bicycles, traveling around the world, and meeting new people? Because I like video games, movies, mystery books, philosophy, walking in the park, going to the gym, riding bicycles, traveling around the world, and meeting new people.

What do you get when you skin a potato? A screaming kid with autism and no skin.

“Before I know it, he’s got both of my hands in his viselike grip above my head, and he’s pinning me to the wall using his lips … His other hand grabs my hair and yanks down, bringing my face up, and his lips are on mine … My tongue tentatively strokes his and joins his in a slow, erotic dance … His erection is against my belly.”

why did the chicken cross the road it didn't it got run over

A bear and a rabbit are taking a shit and. the bear eats the rabbit in a whole bite without chewing...end of story...the end

What did one penguin say to the other Nothing, penguins don't talk.

Why wasn't Susie happy? because she was raped by her grandfather.

What was Hellen Keller's favorite color? A:blue

When Chuck Norris roundhouse kicked the world, He broke his foot because every human being that kicks such a solid structure would break their foot.

Fred: says hi Bob: says shut up why the hell do you have to be so rude!!! Fred:thankyou ob thats better

It's caoimhin I wasnt writing cos kane turned my computer off the bel end aodhans been tuping sayin its be the spa.

A captain crashes his boat into a rock. He has the option to save to save his wife or his best friend. He saves neither and drowns.

How do you make a snake blink? You can't

Why did the little hamster die? Because it had a careless owner who never paid any attention to it. therefor it passed away.

womens rights

What did Selena Gomez say to JB? We're breaking up cuz u smell like French fries and you look like a poop

What do you call a black man running faster than a white man? Usain Bolt

What did the woman say to the dog? Stop shitting on my carpet your dickhole

Why did the chicken cross the road? He was attached to a bomb filled with spoons

Do you want to hear a joke, Women's rights

Whats worse than standing on lego? Rebecca black. whats worse than Rebecca Black? Justin Bieber. Whats worse than justin Bieber? Standing on a baby that isnt yours.

why was the tolit stoped up. because it had phoo

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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