What did the vegitarian order for brunch. VEGITARIANS DONT BELIEVE IN ICE CREAM>

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What's most weird about necrophilia? They copulate with dead bodies.

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Dear Anti Jokes> A black guy walks into a bar...He says hey u Idiot Gimme that Root Beer.. Tony Fast says IDIOT U GET OUTA HERE RIGHT NOW!Black women gets a gun and shoots his son... Tony Fast says im callin the cops on u then they kill alll. And they got hit by a bus. By TobyTurner

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if a tree falls in A Forest, would Robert Smith hear?

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a irish man walks past a bar

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Captain Falcon is eating a restaurant. After he sits down at his table, a waiter comes by to take his drink order. Not wanting to skew his blood alcohol level for his next race, he asks for a non-alcoholic drink. The waiter says, "We only have water and punch. Which would you like?" Captain Falcon replies, "Water, please."

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Why did the man run away from the woman? He forgot his rape kit.

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what are you talking about. Nets are terrible. Lakers are going to be the best.

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Why was six afraid of seven? Back when seven was in Vietnam, he sufferd Posttraumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD) and constantly has flash backs and irrational thoughts of six being with the veitnamese alliance and tries to viciously molest six whenever he runs out of anxiety medication.

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What do you call someone who has slept for 48 hours straight? Dead.

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jimmy walked into a bar, then walked out crying and all desperate seeing his wife cheating on him with another guy sitting in the bar. he jumped in front of a bus and was taken to the hospital. He died due serious injuries. Turns out that it wasn't his wife but her twin sister that neither jimmy nor his wife was aware of her existence.

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What did the boy with no legs get for his birthday? Pants.

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PENIS that is all

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Michael Vick walks into a pet shop. He buys a puppy and cares for it lovingly

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says "Why the long face?" The horse's mother had terminal cancer

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Twitter: @TotalJokes: "So it's been 11 years since the planes hit the world trade centre, time really does fly by."

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How do you spot a paedophile in a playground? You don't, there are usually a lot of adults around.

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What did the orphan get christmas? CANCER

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What's even better than finding 10 bucks in your pocket? Getting into heaven.

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Q: How many elephants can fit inside a Volkswagen Beetle? A: Four.

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Q: Why did Tom bought a new sweeper? A : because his grandma fired their maid

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There was a papa tomato, a mama tomato, and a baby tomato. Coincidentally, it was also Tuesday.

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Cody went to the store. Big Floppy Donkey Dick.

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What did the unicorn say to the horse? I have a horn and you don't.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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