Roses are red, Violets are blue. Rhyming is hard, Zebra.

A bear and a rabbit are taking a shit in the woods, the bear turns to the rabbit and says "I have colon cancer."

there is a black guy and a mexican in a car whos driving? a cop

american idol

Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven was a convicted rapist.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Cause he felt like it.

Why did the man with no arms fall of his bike? Someone threw a washing machine at him

Your mom is so fat that she saw a school bus full of white children and , thought "I can hardly even remember a time when my body used to be slim." She now keeps track of her diet and exercises regularly,the result of this has been a weight loss of over 95 pounds.

Why was sally crying? She could hear her parents having sex.

Why did the Nazi Doctor drown a Jew in the lake? To see how long it would take a Jew to drown with its big nose. --ZeNaziGermanDoctor

why did the bear fall out of the tree? He died. Why did the raccoon fall out of the tree? He was stapled to the bear.

Wanna know a secret? I didn't read or agree to the terms and services

A woman stopped making sandwiches.

A paper cut is a tree's last revenge.

Elephants can jump higher than the tallest building. You know why? It's because buildings can't jump.

What did the cracker say to the cheese? You're so cheesy.

What do you get when you cross a badger and a paper bag? The badger is cross of course but the bag is inanimate and can't be angered.

Why doesn't the man like iced tea? Because he likes it hot.

What's long, brown, and in the toilet? The chocolate bar I just threw in the toilet.

What did Goldilocks ask the Three Bears? Nothing, bears are aggressive mammals and killed her before she could speak.

A woman is in a terrible car crash. The husband comes in, runs to the doctor and he says "Doctor! My wife...is she going to make it?" The doctor turns and says "your wife will survive, but she's experienced heavy brain trauma. She will never walk again. You'll have to bathe her, feed her, change her diapers, and cater to her every need." The husband starts crying and says "oh my God that's terrible! Are you serious?" The doctor replies "Yes."

If you watch the titanic backwards, its really about a magical ship which saves peoples lives!

yo moma so stupid she went to the dentist for a bluetooth.

what do you get when you cross an ant with toni? ANTONI

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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