What would Hellen Keller say to Obama? Nothing she can't speak.

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Here's a riddle: What can you catch, but not throw? A really heavy ball, or STDs.

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What has 2 legs and bleeds a lot? Half a dog

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Why did the Black man buy some slaves? They were his family

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the sky is green no it is not

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Why isn't Billy Mays on TV anymore? Beacause Billy Mays was in a tradgic accident where a bowling ball fell on his head, and a couple days later he died of head trama. His family can't bear to hear his voice anymore.

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Q: What do you get when you cross a chimpanzee and a zebra. A: A crossover between a chimpanzee and a zebra, mixed together.

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why does her hair shine so nicely? she uses good shampoo.

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Today we eat large amounts of pizza. The one piece had a lot of mushrooms. Like more than the other pieces. The cheese was flawless except for the burnt edges.

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why was six afraid of seven? prison changes a person

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In soviet russia, child molests you! Unfortunately true

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why did everyone laugh at the kid in the wheel chair as he entered the room? he was poor

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A woman takes a shortcut through a dark alley. She is raped, robbed, and murdered. Her family mourns her death.

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Hey I just met you, and this is crazy, but here's a free drink, you'll wake up in my basement.

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A bar walks into a man... Wait, that's impossible.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the dead one.

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Whats the difference between a black man and a mexican? The skin pigmentation and most likely the size of their penis

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How do you find the richest man in Mexico? Go through government records and tax files and find the person with the highest salary

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RECTUM? Damn near spelled "Wrecked Him" the wrong way!

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What did the black man see when he looked in the mirror? His reflection.

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Why did the Jew pick up the quarter on the sidewalk? Because he was going to buy a candy bar and was short 25 cents.

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What do you call a black man with a peg leg? Disabled

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Two gay guys are cuddling in a park when they spot a hot, busty blonde jogging near them. One turns to the other and says, "Damn... It's days like this I wish I was a lesbian."

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When I was in 4th grade, I was fat. The other kids would take my lunch and spit in all the food, then give it back. Teachers started to wonder why I wasn't eating, and soon began to ask me if I was anorexic. I replied, "do I look anorexic!?" I'm now 6 foot 3 and weigh 56 pounds. *FUN FACT: based on a heartwarming true story.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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