A dancer walks into a barre

how do make a condom fly around the room? Piss it off!

how do you make jimmy happy you cant he's in a coma

What the difference between a car and a dead child I dont have a car in the basement

What's the difference between me and an animal? I'm human

Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding a baby in your closet.

Violence is never the answer, its the question... The answer is YES!

Q: What's worse than getting a divorce? A: I don't know, i'm still married.

One day, Jimmy didn't wake up.

What does a gay horse eat? Low-energy foods should only be fed to horses who are not regularly being worked and participating in high performance. According to the University of Kentucky's College of Agriculture, energy is vital to horses who need to perform their best as it aids many of the body's functions including muscle contraction, respiration and circulation. Only feed a low-energy diet to an idle horse and feed a high-energy diet to an older or sickly horse and to a working horse.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Um...thats impossible because chickens live on farms theyre are no roads....

roses are red, violets are purple, some poems rhyme, but this one doesn't

If there's somethin' strange in your neighborhood Who ya gonna call 911

How do you fit 10 babies in a bowl? With a blender. How do you get them out of the bowl? You don't, you've already been arrested for multiple cases of infanticide.

What did the black kid get on his report card? Math: C- English: D+ Social Studies: C+ Gym:A+ Science: D- N.P.P.

whats yellow and very big? I dont know. no one will tell me

What did John say to Paul before they entered the car? "Paul, get in the car."

How do you make a white girl commit suicide? Bully her.

Why wasn't the black man served at the bar? Because they didn't serve his kind there... Did I say black guy? I meant to say a horse, wait, did I say bar? I meant the barn, yes, a horse walks into a barn but they couldn't serve him because he wasn't tamed

What does a spider Pig do? Nothing. They dont exist.

Bill: ask me if i am three ducks in a man suit Jim: are you three ducks in a man suit? Bill: yes

Are you gay. No. Ok.

What's the difference between a pile of dead babies and a mountainous mound of slain human offspring? There is none, the second is conferred to the subject of a conversation using a highly advanced vernacular.

Q: Why was the boy sad? A: An Elephant was sitting on his face

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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