A homophobic man walks into a bar and the bartender asks: "what can I get for ya" the man replies: "whisky."

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How do you kill a vampire? You can't because vampires aren't real.

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What did the atheist say to the jew. Well first they had a long discussion about religion and the jew was actually made an atheist. Truly the work of God.

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Why did the kid need glasses? A monkey threw a fridge at him.

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You can teach a man to fish but you cant teach a fish to man

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What do you call a black guy driving a plane? A terrorist.

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You are so ugly that for Halloween you had to trick or treat by phone.

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What do you call a flat-chested woman with a penis? A man.

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Q:When a T- Rex walks into your house what does it mean? A: Your on pot, T-rex's are extinct

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10 kids are on a bus. It's just a normal bus, it takes the kids to school and lets them off.

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guess what>? your mum lol

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My grandfather slipped on a banana peel. I helped him up.

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Timmy had to use the restroom in class one day, so he raised his hand and asked, "Can I use the restroom?" The teacher said, "I don't know, CAN you?" Timmy said'," When I was using 'can', I was using its secondary model form as a verbal modifier for asking for permission, as opposed to expressing ability. I though since you were a teacher you would know that. My bad. MAY I use the restroom?"

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Why did the chicken cross the road? I don't know, ask the chicken.

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Why not zoidburg? Because Zoidburg is a alien from another planet and the human population is probally afraid to talk to him do to the potential danger of alien contact.

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roses are grey violets are grey either i am a dog or i am color blind i cant tell im deaf go die in a hole

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Why couldnt the man find his wallet? He didnt have one

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What did the unicorn say to the horse? I have a horn and you don't.

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why are the Harold and Kumar movies really funny? the man who wrote obvieusly has a good sense of humor.

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How did Harry potter open the door? He had the key

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why does chuck norris not have a middle name? because his parents didn't want him to have one.

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What dithe blackman say to the white man ???? Nothin! They both committed suicide.

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What did the snoop dog have for breakfast? Weed

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What say the mirror if i look in it,? He died

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops