what's blue , and you can urinate it? a rim block.

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How do you earn a bunch of money all at once? Walk into Hot Topic and say "I have knives for sale!"

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Q: Why did the mom try to wake up a sleeping bag? A: Because it's morning and her kid is curled up inside fast asleep

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what do you call a guy with no arms or legs and wearing red and white in the ocean? a dead person and someone needs to call the cops cause thats terrible.

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No just stuff on the internet when I get bored, like on facebook and stuff, why a nurse? Whats wrong? Is he ill?

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Roses are black Violets are black Oh fuck I'm blind!

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? Because I hit her with an axe.

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How do you know when you are really ugly? Objective self-evaluation, and frank, honest discussion with close friends and family.

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The GOV and the WHO?

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Q.what has big ears? A.your vagina.

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How many Russians can you fit in a Mini Cooper? It depends on how big they are.

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Did you see Stevie wonders house? Neither did he.

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How do you drown a blond? You hold her underwater.

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Sugar is sweet. Plums are too. Prison rape isn't funny either.

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What's brown and sticky? Most forms of excrement.

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What did the T-REX say to the Yettie? This is a highly improbable situation, therefore there is no need for an answer.

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Chuck Norris doesn't go hunting, he is very fond of animals and would never want to shoot them.

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Person A - you must be tired, cuz you've been running though my mind all day Person B - i have no legs...

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im gonna poop my pants. mom said to wipe afterwards i am a teletubby

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Why did The white man loose his black friend? Because he ran away.

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What is a white supremacist's favorite color? It varies depending on the individual.

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What did the man do when his truck was stolen? He contacted the police, who immediately began searching for the culprit. He then contacted his car insurance company and was soon compensated for the full value of his truck. One day the man was in his new truck listening to the local news and heard that the thief was found and convicted of Grand Theft Auto; his name was Martin Kaiser.

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What do you call a big group of Chinese people on Mars? An extraordinary feat for the Chinese space program and a historic day in human history, where a particular country has set up the first human colony on another planet and we have proven to ourselves that our race is capable of interplanetary travel and can accomplish anything if we set our minds to it.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He saw a bottle of Faygo on the other side.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops