What's black and white and red all over? The newspaper classified section after a man has abandoned long, futile job hunt. He has crossed out all the potential jobs with red ink. He was laid off due to the downturn in the economy and will now have to get food stamps, which is very embarrassing for a man who has worked to support his family his entire life.

What is worse than catching someone trying to cheat by looking at your exam? Getting struck by lightning.

Why did the chicken cross the road .... The traffic light turned red

A dog walks into a bar. He's a service animal, so this is allowed.

To the 'am i pregnant now?'-section: Yesterday I spilled mustard on my brand new pants. That was just before I went out to some clubs. That night, after I had enjoyed myself with friends and alcohol, while I was walking home I was raped several times by big, black and hung men. It hurt a lot and my anus is still bleeding. My question is: What is the best way to get rid of the mustard stain?

How do you find out a chinese's name? Ask him/her

Roses are red Violets are violet the last time i saw this poem i couldn't rhyme no more

I was going to write a joke about Alzheimers ... but I completely forgot it.

Why did the man die? He had a terrible form of flesh-eating bacteria and he suffered a lot of pain.

"Why did Jim Jones put cyanide in the People's Temple Flavor Aid?" Because he understood that adding sugar would be bad for their teeth.

Why did the black man commit suicide last tuesday? he was just fired from his job, his sister passed away, and he became depressed

what is bad about being a black jew? you have to sit in the back of the oven

did you hear about the dyslexic, overweight, wheelchair bound blind guy? No? Niether did I, I'm deaf so don't hear about anything.

What's big, white, and kills niiggers? Hurricane sandy

A man walks into a bar. It turns out he's an alcoholic, and he goes home and beats his wife.

A guy with a severe attention deficit walks into a bar and... oh, look, the sky is pretty... wait, what was I saying ?

Why did the woman leave the kitchen? She didn't, she's a woman.

What was the last thing that went through the crashing helicopter pilot's head? The propeller.

It works on whoever I have an emotional attachment with, for example people might be thinking you and I write in the exact same style, but I am actually copying your way of typing (spelling, word composition etc) this because we relate on a deep emotional level with people that like "get us" because they can act and behave like us. This again doubles the effect of the hypnosis, since when I get "super high on trance" and you feel that way, well, we both reach into the same wavelength, literally. Scientists and hypnotists supposedly have no idea as to why this happens, but I know, it is because our brain patterns are so similar, that even though we are at a long distance, your body believes itself to be an extension of mine and the other way around. How do I know this? Yogurt.

Why couldn't Hellen Keller drive? Because she was blind.

Do they censor Ass? TESTING TESTING ASS ASS ASS

Whats the difference between a man and a cat. There both different species.

This is a joke about Helen Keller. "Knock knock" "Who's there?

a man with a scar on his right hand walked in to a b c d e f g h i j k l m n o p q r s t u v w x z y.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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