There were two chippendales in a bar - what were their nicknames? Chip and Dale

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why did the little boy fall down?? Because a terrorist shot him

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1:Your reading my text. 2:Your wondering what the point is. 3:Your getting angry. 5:Your going to click thumbs down. 6:But wait! You didn't realize that there was no number 4. 7:Your checking it. 9:Your smiling. 10:Your smiling so much you forgot to check for number 8. 11:Your checking it. 12:Jokes on you.

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How do you know if elephants are watching a movie? If a Volkswagen Beetle is parked outside the movie house.

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Did you go swimming in the Carribean Ocean? Yes, a shark ate my body, and killed me! Thank God I'm still alive!

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What did the librarian say to the rude man who was talking very loudly? The librarian said "shhh keep it down."

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Neil is a reterd.

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Did you see Helen Keller at the movie theater? I didn't either, she's dead.

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A priest enters a bar moments after a young teen walks into the same bar. The priest scolds the teen, warning him of the possibility of arrest, alcoholism, and other bad life consquences. The teen apologizes to the bartender, and much later in life, he thanks the priest.

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What do men and parking spots have in common? Both often have cars on top of them. Vehicular manslaughter is a serious issue.

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Why did Susie fall off the swing? Because she had no arms. Knock knock Whose. There? Not Susie.

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What did the Chinese guy say to the black guy? Nothing, the black guy dosen't speak chinese.

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when choosing a bedtime story.... jack the rippers life stories is not a good idea... ........................................................................

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What did the pepperoni say to the pepper We are both tacos

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why is cancer a big thing because its bad

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Why does sammy have a cut on her arm? becuase her mom went to go stab her dad and missed

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Q: Why did the black man shit himself? A: He experienced post-mortem bowel release after he was murdered due to his racial identification.

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Q: What can a black man do that a llama can't? A: Walk

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.der era sesoR .eulb era steloiV .sdrawkcab nettirw saw ecnetnes sihT .yrgnuh m'I won dnA

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When is a door not a door? When it is thrown away. Then, it will likely decompose in a landfill or be recycled into another product. In either case, it will no longer be a door.

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Q: why did the 10 year old squirt his dad with the water hose? A: what 10 year old WOULDN'T?

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Why did the little boy fall off the swing? Because he had no arms. Why did no one help him up? Because nobody liked him.

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Do the roar!

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What does the kid with no arms and no legs get for christmas? A: arms and legs

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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