What did the day say to his son when he came out of the closet? Its alright

A Black man walks into the Dentist's office, because he cares about his hygiene.

Why did the wheel fall of the car?? Cause you can't fit 10 pancakes inside of a doghouse.

A monkfish walks into a bar... The world blew up

Knock knock. Who's there? Nobody is here, nobody would ever want to knock on the door of you. Yes, you. You reading these awful jokes.

what happens when you punt a baby in between 2 poles? you get 3 points

What did the man in the mirror say to the other man The Same F****** Thing!!

Why did the man cross the road? Because he couldn't get his dick out of the chicken

a blond readhead and a brunnett were driving to Miami, they saw a sign for next exit Miami, turned off the exit went to the beach did some shopping and all had a great time together.

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead

Why did the Bruins win against the Flyers? ....they had goal tending.

What did Tom see after taking a much need long nap? The ceiling.

A brachiosaurus walks into a cafe "Excuse me I'm an herbivore, can I have a full English breakfast, but with veggie sausages instead of normal sausages, and mushrooms instead of bacon?" Shop keeper: "No you can't. Your too big. You've destroyed my kitchen, and my livelihood. I have nothing left. You've accidently reduced my business to rubble by walking through the door"

Why did the Christian man dislike gays? Because Christianity views being gay as a sin, and as a follower of the religion he decided he did not like gays.

A Mexican got stopped by the police. Turns out it was a mistake and the man lived a happy life in America

''I went to the zoo the other day, there was only one dog in it, it was a shitzu.''

How many retards does it take to screw in a lightbulb? No number of them could figure it out. They sit in the dark for hours, scared of the monsters.

What is worse than stepping on Lego bare foot? Mass genocide.

Scream went into the bar. The bartender says," Why the long face?" "..." *facepalm*

NO ONE LIKES RANGAS

dont you love porch monkeys? no.

why'd the chicken cross the road It didn't, it was safely placed inside a chook house

An old man walks into a bar. He suffered greater injury than a younger man due to his advanced age and deteriorating health. But he did eventually recover by strictly adhering to his doctor's advice of bed rest, improved diet, and increased, yet moderate, aerobic exercise.

what did the apple say to the orange? :nothing because an apple is not a human organism nor an orange therefore they can not speak....

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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