What do an elephant and a can of soup have in common? They both can't ride a bike

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knock knock whos there? your mom really? well whats she wearing a refridgerator.

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What's the difference between a Obama and a drug-dealer? I don't know what? I don't know, I was asking if you know...

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jacob mckeand broke his arm and now he cant wank :(:(:(

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A man walks into a bar. He suffers a fatal concussion and the playground is shut down by local police until proper padding is installed.

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Whats red and crawls up your leg? A homesick abortion.

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Q: What's purple and eats desks. A: My dog.

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Why did dallin fall off the swing he got hit by jds big penis

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Why couldn't little sally swim? Because she had weights on her ankles.

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Q. how does james bond like his babies A.shaken not stirred but if u think thats bad wait till u see a stirred baby

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How many feminists does it take to screw in a light bulb? Two. One to screw in the light bulb and one to suck my dick.

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Why did Sarah fall off the swing? She doesn't have arms. Knock, knock, Who's there? Not Sarah.

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What's awesome about going to a no-pants party? Getting stabbed 2 times.

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What's funnier than 24? Many things, the number 24 is not very humorous.

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Day turn night. Dreaming is now true . Turn on your flashlight, slenderman is behind you.

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roses are red violents are blue your dad is gay soon it all be you !

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have you seen stevie wonder's house. no? Well nethier has he you

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Your mother is so fat, that making fun if her is a terrible thing to do.

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Whats green and fuzzy and will kill you if it falls out of a tree? A pool table

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Why didn't Johnny have any food left? Because he ate it all.

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Roses are grey, Violets are grey, I'm a dog.

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A blonde walks into a bar. That's it.

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A man walks into a bar and sees that the pianist is just twelve inches tall. He asks the bartender, ''How come you have a 12-inch pianist?'' The bartender replies, ''We have a genie in the back room. He'll answer all your wishes, but be careful, because he has a little trouble hearing.'' The man walks into the back room and asks the genie for a million bucks. The genie then gives him a million ducks. The man comes out and tells the bartender that the genie misheard his wish. The bartender says, ''Come on, now! Do you really think I asked for a 12-inch pianist?!''

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Listen bitch, get over here, let me poke out your fucking eyeball, and then you tell me if it is reasonable or not to fucking be pissed afterwards! As for your goddamn technique, of course I understand it, I use it too, its the ironman method as far as I am concerned. Do not share it with people here, you can go share it with your little "shadow people" but that shit took years to develop. But yeah, you tell me whatever the hell you consider "reasonable" you get me the money, and then we can see about being "reasonable". I know many of your methods, NLP, hypnosis, covert, warm and cold reading, I know you are no fucking psychic nor do you read minds, stop telling me what the hell your "Order" is, because whatever the hell it is, your "Nero`s" have proven on this site alone, that its a laughingstock that in no way could have brought six hundred people towards liking you, even less six millions.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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