How many dueche bags does it take to change a light bulb? 0 They're two complete unrelated things

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Roses are Red, Violets are Blue I have ADD Check out this flashlight!

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Q:Why do you never run over black guy on a bicycle A: Because that is not a very nice thing to do

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Schrodinger's cat walks into a bar. And doesn't.

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Why did the plane crash? The pilot was a screaming goat

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Q: What's green, red, and covered in cookie crumbs? A: A dead girl scout.

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A horse walks into a bar and Shits John Taffer is Pissed

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why was sally the best at hid and go seek they couldn't find her body

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Your gay

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How Do You Solve A Impossible Math Question? You Dont. cause its impossible.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He didn't, a car ran him over.

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Mike lost his arms in a car accident. Knock knock Who's there? Not Mike.

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How do you make a 4 year old cry? You tell him all his family died in a horrible plane crash.

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Justin Beiber walks into a bar. The bartender does not serve him because he is not the legal drinking age yet.

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Why did Sara fall off the swing? Sara had no arms! Knock knock? Who's there? Not Sara!

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What's the difference between a box of dead babies and a mustang? I don't have a mustang in my garage..

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How long can penguins hold their breath underwater? Long enough for you to eat a baby and then cover for it.

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jhaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaan!

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How do you kill a blonde? The blonde you were planning on killing, Sarah, arrives home from a rather tiring run. She lets her hair down from her ponytail, and even though she is a little sweaty At the moment, you realize what a beautiful woman she really is. You decide to ask her to marry You, and after she says yes, you two make passionate love in the front seat Of your 2011 Cadillac Escalade.

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Yo momma so fat, when she walks she wakes the dead -Ryan Vallee

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what's body surfing? sounds dumb.

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42

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Roses are red Violets are blue These are facts that many people know

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hey i just met you and this is crazy but here is my gun so get in the van

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops