What's the difference between a Jew and a Canoe Well one is a human, beating heart, and the other is a small boat you row in

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What do u call something that's sticky and in a stick form? A glue stick :)

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If you are what you eat, then imagine a prostitute.

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how many shit jokes do you need to make before you realize that random does not equal funny? An egg.

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What did the prosecuting attorney say to the defense attorney? I hate you.

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whats ironic about a white van being white the driver usualy is not

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y was John so sad becaus his mom took his phone

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What do you get when you cross a Minotaur with a snowman? A cold mythological creature.

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I'm black and I will beat your children. (This is not an anti-joke)

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Roses are red violets are blue I fucked your mom now im about to fuck you to.

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The once was a man from Nantucket, Who gave up on his life and said "damn this!" Then he won lots of money, His future looked bright and sunshiny Until one day he suddenly died

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What time is it in China right now? I have no idea, it would depend on when you are reading this. Perhaps you should look at a world clock, watch, or some other sort of time-telling device rather than humorous website. Its purpose is not to tell time. However, there are many other places for this. Good luck surfing the web, friend. I have aided you the best that I can. I only hope that you will find what you are looking for.

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I hate weddings! Old people always poke u and say "ur next" so I've decided to do the same to them... At Funerals

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What's got two legs and bleeds a lot? Half a dog.

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If you had 4 oranges in one hand and 7 oranges in the other, what would you have? Really big hands.

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What did Stephen Hawking say after he scaled Mount Everest? Yay!

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A guy walks into a bar. I didn't see anything else.

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Two girls are in a car together. The one in the drivers seat is texting while driving. The girl in the passengers seat notices this and tells her the she should put it away in case of a risk of a collision. She apologizes and puts it away and the two of them drive to the store unharmed and continued their normal day.

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Roses are black Violets are black I would love to see A knife in ur back

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Stephen Hawking walks into a bar. Everyone in the bar is very happy for him considering he has regained the ability to walk

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What's the difference between a pizza and a girl? I've stuck my penis in a pizza

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If life hands you lemons you're probably hallucinating

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Why can't Jade Goody go swimming? Because she's dead.

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what did the guy say when his partner took a poop on his chest? It was unnecessary for you to deficate onto my chest. In no way at all was that sexually stimulating, and i shall consider seeking out a new partner.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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