What did the Fish say to the other Fish? Nothing, fish cant talk.

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whats better than 1,000,000 dollars? 1,000,001 dollars

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What do you say when you see a flying donkey Wtf

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A man was eating a hamburger when a boy came up and took his hamburger. So the got up and went to the counter and orderd another hamburger

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Why couldn't jack join the football team? Jack has down syndrome

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Why'd the girl drop her lollipop? She got hit by a bus.

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Why did the first monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the first monkey. Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? It thought they were playing follow the leader. Why did the refrigerator fall out of the tree? It had no arms. Why did the little girl fall off her tricycle? She was hit by three monkeys and a refrigerator.

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There is a high speed pursuit when suddenly the suspect's car skids out of control and crashes into a field. Two cows witness the commotion, when one turns round to the other and says "Moo"

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What's the difference between shoes and babies? You can't eat shoes.

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ok guys finish this joke: Im the biggest fag-got because_____________.

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Hey, you know what would be funny? A joke.

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What came first? The chicken or the egg? The egg, because breakfast comes before dinner.

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Your mother smells so bad that if she were alive in 1919 she would most likely be outlawed in the Geneva Convention or at least banished from conventional warfare among nations that adhere to the restrictions imposed by such a document

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Bacon makes everything delicious, yes? And coffee makes everything exciting, yes? Put the two together and you get a caffeinated porky roller coaster in your mouth.

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So a ninja walks into a bar and he sees a cowboy and the ninja says i will kill you with my mad ninja skills and the cowboy says who needs mad ninja skills when you got a gun

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did the chicken fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the monkey.

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A zebra walks into bar, the surrounding customers in the bar become very intrigued why this exotic creature has wandered from Africa into New york. Before they can come to a concluson animal control opens fire on the creature, splatering its organs onto the tables. This event ruined the night for most customers and they fileout of the bar calmly but sad

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Whats worse than finding out one of your grandparents died, finding out both your grandparents died.

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Guns dont kill people...whoever pulled the trigger kills people

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What did muscleman say to his dad? You know who else is my dad? MY MOM!

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Roses are red. Violets are blue. I'm gonna f*ck you with a rake.

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What would you do for a klondike bar? Pay the manufacturers suggested retail price.

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How many blacks does it take to screw in a lightbulb? None we have mexicans for that

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Person 1 Hey man what's up Person 2 nothing much I just impregnated your mom

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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