Your momma is so fat she has an increased risk or cardiac arrest due to obesity. I ridicule her based on the theory that her morbid obesity is due to the fact that she has a diet consisting of large amounts of calories and high fat content and/or she is known to be very sedentary and does not partake in physical exercise. However, if this increase in body fat content is due to genetics I retract my previous statement and wish only the best for her, also, you might want to lower your calorie intake and visit your local gym, lest you succumb to morbid obesity, much like your mother.

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A guy walks into a restaurant and sits down only to realize he is not wearing any pants. Immediately the police are called and arrest the man for indecent exposure. Given there were children in the restaurant at the time, the man is also charged as level 3 sex offender and is held on $100,000 bail. His family receives the news and become the talk of the town. His wife commits suicide from embarrassment, leaving her 10 year old son up for adoption who later gets involved with drugs due to his rough childhood.

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what happens when you shoot a piece of soup It dies

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Roses are red Violets are blue The last time I saw your mom I made you

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A blind child sign is at the end of my street. I have never seen the child, but at least if he were to come outside at the right time period i might be able to spot him, whereas he would having no way of returning the gesture.

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Why did the baby fall off the swing? It had no arms or legs. Why did the little girl fall off the swing? Because I kicked her in the face.

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What's worse than the holocaust? Finding a worm in your apple.

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A little boy went to a sleep over . They watched a episode of pokemon and the flashing lights triggered the boys epilepsy he was driven to hospital and is recovered.

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Why did the woman get into a car accident? She was blind.

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WHERE WAS THE DECLARATION OF INDEPENTENTS AT THE BOTTEM!!!

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Whats the difference between a pile of dead babies and a ferrari? I dont have a ferrari in my garage!

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Why is 13 the most hated number? 13 is Jewish.

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You: Want to hear a joke? Person: Yeah You: Me too

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Why isn't the dog a rebublican? Because it's a dog.

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Yo momma's so fat that when she asked the doctor, he said she could have such bad cardiovascular problems if yo mamma keep the typical sedentary habits, wich consist in a diet with a lots of fat and sugar, the lack of physical exercise and genetical characterists which make a person get fatter more easily.

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Why did the boy fall off his bike? Because someone threw a fridge at him.

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What's better than rape? Consensual sex.

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WHAT HAS MAN BOOBS THE SIXE OF JUPITER BOMBER NEVILLE

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How many victims of the holocaust does it take to screw in a light bulb? Zero. They're all dead you sick fuck.

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SHUT UP JP

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Why did Fred fall off the bike? He was a shoe.

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What did the black guy say after coming home from school? "I just got home from school."

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What is the difference of The United States and 10 pounds of shit? Well,considering there are 50 united states,we would take 10 away from 50 for a total of 40. A very simple subtraction problem indeed.

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Two men walk into a bar. You would think the second man would have seen it. Made by Bobbie Pummel

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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