Chuck Norris once jumped off of a 9 story building. He broke half of the bones in his body because he is 71 years old.

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a potato walks into a bar. people stare as it is physically impossible for a potato to walk since it is a vegetable

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who lives a pineapple under the sea? a proper spazztwat.

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What did Osama bin Laden say when he heard loud gunshots outside his millitary compound? A: We'll never find out

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You know what's lame? A person who can't walk.

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What did the boy with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? nothing he was Jewish

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What's dark, has an opening, and guys like to go in it. A cave

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A Women is holding a piece of paper with her rights what is she holding a grocery list

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What´s Green and turns Red at your Finger Tips? Frog in a Blender.

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How does a man with no legs cross a road? In his wheelchair.

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Why did the little girl fall off the swing? She had no arms.

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yo mama's so fat because when women are pregnet thay gain weight for there child to feed on

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Q:How much wood could a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? A: Well, we can solve this problem of the wood chuck chucking our wood by putting all of your spare wood in a wood chipper. Try throwing dust you chucking bastard.

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An old man, and his daughter are walking down the street. They are having a nice time, until the daughter turns around to see the old man lying on the ground in pain because of the crippling arthritis in his back that has caused him agony and discomfort for years.

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What's green and has wheels? A frog in a wheelchair

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A man walks into an insane asylum and says hello-The inmates assault him with mindless babble. A man walks into an insane asylum and says argblthenthrozaphowea-The inmates say hello.

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A black man and a Mexican are in a car. Who's driving? The cop. The two men were best friends who had taken off from their law firm. Alex had recently gone through a divorce and John decided to take him on a trip backpacking across Europe. One rainy night an off-duty police officer picked them up and took them out for drinks. The friends had a wonderful trip. But Alex never got over Jenny leaving him. 3 months later John found him dead in his home by auto-erotic asphyxiation.

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What's worse than finding your cat dead? Finding your cat dead because it choked on your goldfish.

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what's the difference between a zebra and a horse They are spelled differently

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Did you hear the one about the streetlight? It only came on at night.

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A apple a day is good for your overall health and you should schedule check ups with your doctor to maintain good health and avoid seeing him everyday.

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Why'd The Chicken Cross The Road? He Crossed The Road To Stand In An Icecream Line , Where A Little Boy Stood Infront Of Him, The Chicken Was Scared To Cross The Road Again To Get To The Other Side Because He Saw The Little Boy Get Hit By A Bus. So The Chicken Decided The Best Thing To Do Was To Sit Under A Tree , Where A Big White Thing Fell On Him , It Was A Fridge, Once The Fridge Hit The Ground Mexicans Ran Out And Then Explained To There Local Chickens What Crossing The Street Can Cause Them. To Be Dead. Moral: Dont Let A Chicken Cross The Road. :)

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If life hands you lemons... Question yourself what just happened because life isn't tangible and has no way of handing you lemons, and even if it did, why lemons?

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What did the racist black man say to the white man? Nothing they both died in a car accident.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops