You know what makes me sick? Bacteria

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Two guys walked into a pub... and they totally redecorated it! It was brilliant.

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Why did the boy fall off the swing? Because a fridge hit him.

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Q: Why are elephants afraid of mice and/or rats? A: Elephants tend to have bad eyesight and startle quite easily?

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Why can't penguins fly? Because their wings are adapted to swim and not to fly

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Q: Why was the man wet? A: I push him in a pool.

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What's the difference between Republicans and Democrats? There is a series of boxes which one can choose to check on a ballot, officially registering an individual with a certain party. Available parties include the Green Party, The American Communist Party, The Republican Party, and the Democratic Party among others. Republicans choose to check the Republican box, Democrats choose to check the Democrat box. Also Republicans are closet homosexuals and Democrats are terrorists.

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How is a frog similar to a corn dog? They both have really long tongues, except for the corn dog

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What's black and blue, and read all over? The Merriam-Webster dictionary.

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What did Harry Potter say when he lost his wand? Where's my wand?

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Why did the boy do his homework? For fun.

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I'm so punny.

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What did the lawyer say to the other lawyer? "We are both lawyers."

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What's worse than the holocaust? Giovanna Plowman.

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what do you call a kid named kid. kid

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What's funnier than a jalapeño? A jalapeño on a stick.

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yo momma so fat, Bob's furniture store is having a sale on wednesday at 5:00.

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what did the dog eat for dinner? food.

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A horse walks into a bar. Just kidding, it's a panda.

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What do you call a 2 storied house ? A dolphin! :D

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Yo mama so fat she has more chins than the Chinese phone book. A.V.T was here Fred.

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Identical jokes get different amounts of votes

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What did the man do when he went in the bathroom he took a crap wiped his butt and washed his hands and went back to meet his family at the dinner table

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Roses are red, violets are blue, you are my slave, get back to work!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops