What happens when a gay guy and a hillbilly enter at the same bar togather? a police dog nation gards and a priest had to stop the abomination.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Why did the baby cross the road? he was taped to the chicken

thumb_up thumb_down -7

When the mom got home from work, she was very tired. Her 6 year old son asked her nicely to make him a PB&J sandwich. She said sure and made one. Her son was very pleased and ate all of it. He knew he had a great mom. I actually lied above. The mom was killed by three men in hoodies in her back yard. They came inside and also murdered to boy. Worst of all the killers stole all of her food including the rasberries the boy was looking forward to eat. I guess it doesn't matter now since he is unable to eat anymore...

thumb_up thumb_down -7

What's the song that goes like, duh duh da duh duh duh da da do?

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Why did Susie fall off the monkey bars? She had no arms.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

What did the Mexican firefighter name his twin sons? Nothing, his wife had an abortion.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

A Mexican and an African American are in a car, who is driving? The Mexican, while the African American rides in the passenger seat.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Nero, listen, do not try to imply that you created the Iron man method, that was developed by many people over the duration of many years in the former underground society. You seem far too educated to be the savage you claim to be, if I told you that our people will do the uttermost to see if we can fix that eye of yours and succeed, will you forgive my failure and imperfections as a leader? Look at it this way, I am a leader, not a ruler, what my followers do is up to them, but if they cannot understand that they have to pay the consequences behind their actions, they have no place within the order, as for the expression "my order" it is simply what my many followers like for me to say, not because they are unwilling to take responsibility, but as a token of praise. Our articulations and means of expressing desire and such are very much the same, have you ever been part of our order?

thumb_up thumb_down -7

An orphan walks into a bar. The bartender calls Child Protective Services and is given to a nice foster family.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Roses are red Violets are blue Faces like yours belong in the zoo But dont worrie ill be there Not in a cage But laughing at you

thumb_up thumb_down -7

What has 389,236,587 arms, has rainbow colored fur, and fornicates on your front lawn? Absolutely nothing. That's pretty much physically impossible.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

A man walks up to a girl and says "Hello there" The girl doesn't respond because she has been deaf and blind for her entire life and doesn't know he is there. Potatoes.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Chuck Norris and Bane recently had a fight on a bet. The result was Bane won easily as he is the much bigger and stronger man, and Chuck Norris lacks the skills he once possessed as a younger man as he is now 72 years old.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Why did the boy fall off his bike? Prior to this incident he was being chased by a psychopathec killer who had just murdered his family. As he was escaping on his bike, the murder's lookout who was holding a shotgun, swung the butt end of the gun, causing severe brain damage and eventually death to the escaping boy, also causing him to topple over on his bycicle.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

"What's long, black, and smelly?" "The unemployment line." Upon hearing his boss tell this joke, the accountant files a complaint with human resources and the boss must attend several work training classes to develop a better sense of racial awareness and compassion. The workplace soon becomes a much less threatening environment for all people.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

how do you keep a black kid from jumping on the bed? pick up a parenting book ask him nicely try a time out not care because he's a kid and hes supposed to jump on beds?

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Will you please answer one question for me? "Yes" Thank you. -walk away-

thumb_up thumb_down -7

* pretend your an orphan Knock knock Who's there? Not your parents.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Roses are Red Violets are Blue Some poems have endings

thumb_up thumb_down -7

A blonde, a brunette and a redhead dive off a motorboat. They are sucked into the propeller and brutally disfigured instantly.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

What does china and an 80 year old body builder have in common? They're both asian. I forgot to mention that the body builder is japanese.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Have you seen Hellen Kellers mon?... Neither has she

thumb_up thumb_down -7

How did the dinosaurs die???? How the Heck do I kno?

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Q: What would happen if you didn't sleep all night? A: You would probably be really tired and start seeing things and speaking strange sentences as a result.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops