What's worse than getting raped by a bear? Getting raped by two bears.

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Why did Timmy masticate in front of everyone at the dinner table? If he hadn't, he would have choked on large chunks of food.

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Knock Knock. Who's There? Look through your peephole, you lazy bastard.

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How do you blindfold an asian? With a blindfold.

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Three blondes walk into a bar. They have an intellectual conversation over some drinks.

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You know, people are kind of like trees, they tend to fall over when you hit them multiple times with an axe.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Fire extinguisher. Fire extinguisher who? POMEGRANITES.

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Roses are gray, Violets are gray, I'm colorblind, I hate my life

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What did the traffic light say to the car? dont look at me am changing.

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What do you call a fish with no eyes? The Mexican blind cave tetra (Astyanax mexicanus).

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Knock, Knock! Go away!

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How do you put a bananna in a mini-van? Walk up to the mini-van and stick it in the backseat.

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When birds fly south for the winter they fly in a V formation. one side is always longer than the other. why is that? Because there are more birds on that side

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How do you stop a blind kid from walking into oncoming traffic? .................to late!!!!!!!

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What's the difference between a tiger and a shark? One's a land mammal.

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How do you get 1,000 dead babies into a car? Blender How do you get them out? Straw

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Q: How do you know a chinese guy robbed your house? A: your homework is done, your computer is updated, and 2 hours later he is still trying to back out of your driveway

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how do you prevent a chicken from contracting aids?? you make him a little chicken condom.

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What did the plant say to the human. Nothing.

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Your mother is so fat that she has to undergo amputation of her foot because of type 2 diabetes.

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Why doesn't Caillou have hair? Because he has cancer.

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why did the teacher say that the student did well in class? because the student did well in class

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What sound does a baby in a blender make? I don't know, I was too busy masturbating.

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how much kush does it take to get kushagra high

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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