What is small, naked and covered in sperm My son

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A man recently set the world record for jumping into a foot of water from 50 feet high. Luckily, this made the clean-up rather simple.

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Who smells like urine and his da is a registered sex offender with madeline mccann in his house? Aodhan hearty, May I also include he looks like a bug. Oh and don't forget the rot on his teeth, it is fucking disgusting. It really looks like he hasn't brushed his teeth in quite a substantial period of time, in my opinion, he is the only person who is actually comparible to sean.

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Guy walks into a bar and orders a drink. He goes to the restroom and urinates. He comes back and orders another drink. He goes to the restroom again and urinates. He comes back and orders another drink. Guess what happens next? A. He goes to the restroom to urinate B. He buys another drink C. He flirts with a very attractive lady D. Goes home and masturbates

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What do astronauts do if the want a party? They planet

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Rain rain go away, and don't come back or else i will kill your family.

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Knock knock.

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A man climbs a tree, falls, and breaks his legs. He will never walk again

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Whats Big, Brown, and smells like Horse Crap? Horse Crap

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what do michael Jackson and little boys do in the dark alone? they turn on the flashlight

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What did the man say to his dead wife? "I'm Blind."

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What do you call a mexican man with a rubber toe? Ruberto.

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What's more sad then a dumpster full of dead babies? The live one at the bottom.

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What's the difference between a duck? Both legs are of equal length, especially the right.

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how do you get a clown to fall off a swing? hit him with an ax

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Why did the friendly not play outside? Because they were dead. Just like your dreams.

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There was a man that Invited Bruce Wayne, Superman, Peter Parker, Batman, Clark Kent and Peter Parker to his party He was really sad when he heard only half of them could attend...

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Joe:Hi Steve how was your day? Steve:Fine why do you ask? Joe:Because I am gay. Steve:Well if you are so happy tell your sister.

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Question to make it sound like a racist joke? Politically correct answer that should not offend anyone.

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Knock Knock Who's there? The police. Your under arrest for drug trafficking and possession of illegal firearms. You have the right to remain silent. Anything you say...

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Q:Whats a similarity between your mom and your dad? A:They both hate you -Ryan V

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What is worse than a dead baby nailed to a tree? Obama

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What did the piano say to the ice cube? Dude, get back in the freezer or you are going to melt!

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Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Getting raped by a giant scorpion

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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