why did the man slip on the knife? he wanted to commit suicide

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Kerry Katona becomes independent.

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Your mom is so ugly, she suffers from severe depression and regularly contemplates suicide.

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What's long, hard, and contains semen? A submarine.

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whats better than 7 babies in one trash can 1 baby in 7 trash cans

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How did the old man die? He was shot after eating a rather large watermelon while skydiving out of a helicopter, boob fighting 5 toddlers.

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How did the chicken cross the road? It didn't. On its way there, he got hit by a bus.

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PS3 has the exerrent technorogy and finersse to make excerrent gaming such as... ...ITS RIDGE RACER! RIIIIIIIIIDGE RACEEEEEEEEEEEER!

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What's worse than losing the remote? A steamroller going backwards on the highway.

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what do you when a black guy gives you a muffin. you eat it because he was your waiter.

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bite me

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Why did the man feel like he was flying? Because he had just committed suicide by jumping off of a tall building.

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Knock Knock. Who's There? Orange. Orange Who? No, this is Homeland Security. We have raised the current terrorism threat level to Orange, which means there is a high risk of terrorist attacks. Please report any suspicious behavior.

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An alien, a midget, and a Jew walk into a bar... I forget the rest but your mom's a whore

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What does a black kid get for Christmas? Your bike

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A man stumbles into a bar and yells, "Let's get wa-" and falls to the floor dead. The forensic scientists preform an autopsy and find that after 15 years of achoholism and depression caused his heart to stop beating. His family may have mourned his loss, if he had not left them penniless after killing his wife.

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How did the man break his arm raking leaves? He fell out of the tree.

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A B C D E F G.... Gummy bears are chasing me 1 is red, 1 is blue 1 is tryin to steal my shoe now i'm running for my life cuase the red 1 has a knife

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Man 1: Did you hear that one about that girl who killed herself? Man 2: No Man 3: Yeah, neither did I

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What do you call a bear in the rain? A wet bear.

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What did the Black women tell her Asian boyfriend in bed Nothing because they don't talk when they are sleeping

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Why did Mary fall off the swings? Because she had no arms. Knock Knock, Whos there, Not Mary

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what does nba stand for? Nothing but Africans

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A priest, a minister and a rabbi walk into a bar and the bartender says: "Where would you like to sit, gentlemen"?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops