Roses are Red. Violets are blue. I took a shit on your wife's face last night.

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5 people are walking

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Why didn't Johnny's father come home? He was killed in Afghanistan.

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What did the black man say to the Jew? Hi.

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what did one mute say to the other? Nothing.

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What did the wall say to the other wall? I didn't say anything because it isn't living and it can't talk because it is impossible.

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Person 1 - Did you know there is only evidents of killer whales killing in captivity Person 2 - tell that to my uncle Pete... He's deaf

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A fish swims up your penis...

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what did the lamp say to the woman Nothing, a lamp is a plastic glass and metal inaminate object therfore it can not speak

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What did I say to the joke? What? Correct.

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What do you get when you cross a gay man with a chainsaw? A decapitated homosexual.

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Why didn't the 13 year old boy have any friends? He was autistic and didn't connect properly with people.

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Whats worse than being a black guy? NOTHING.

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Q: what does a worm and a fish have in common? A: they are both a worm, apart from the fish

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 was involved in a homicide at the Children's Hospital resulting in death row right away and was involved in the killing of 12 other numbers on last Tuesday.

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A blue whale walks into a bar. The bartender says "What can I get for you?" The blue whale says "EEEEEEYYYYYYYOOOOHHHHHMMMMMMM"

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because I shot him. Why did the other monkey fall out of the tree? Because his tail was stapled to the other monkey.

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Why can't you hear a pterodactyl go to the bathroom? Because they're extinct.

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An American, an Irish man, a Chinese man and a Black man walk in to a Bar, the Bartender takes their order

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Person 1: I'm really sleepy. Person 2: Then go to sleep.

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Why couldn't Cait walk her dog? She's been paralyzed from the waist down since she was 5 after her and her parents got into a car accident and her parents died.

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Kid 1 "Man this is the hardest poop i've ever taken." Kid 2 "Maybe it's because you ate the Happy Meal toys." Kid 1 "You know what? I think you're right. Commotion ensues as the toilet bowl fills with blood as the action figure has cut the inside of his large intenstine. He is screaming in pain. Kid 2 reacts quickly getting him to the hospital just making it in time before Kid 1 passes out. Thankfully he survives but has to get shrgery. Meanwhile, the family dog Buster decides to drink the blood poop water from the bowl and dies from poisining.

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Why did the teenager drink a beer? Because it was actually full of sizzurp

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What do you get if you convict a white man of murder? A black man in prison.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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