T-mobile girl: Knock knock. Random person 1: Who is it? ...... *next house* T-mobile girl: Knock knock. Random person 2: Who is it? ...... *next house* T-mobile girl: Knock knock. Random person 3: Come in.

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whats cold, blue and hard? a frozen blueberry.

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Why is the deer afraid of the hunter? Because he doesn't want to get shot.

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What did the snowman say to the other snowman? Do you smell carrots?

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Why did the hooker cross the road? Because was a prostitute

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What's worse than reading a bad joke Realizing it's yours.

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do you know whats worse than a bad joke on antijoke.com the holocaust.

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What's red and round? A red and round solid.

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What's the funniest part of a tomato? The skin.

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Man I just flew in from Pittsburgh...Boy are the people ugly.

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Intercom:ALERT! THERES AND EXTREIMEST IS THE SCHOOL! Little kid: Sir, can I borrow that towel on your head? BOOOOOOM!

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mary poppins' handbag is full of dick

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What does a black guy get for Christmas? your bike.

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Wanna hear a joke? Niklas Bendter being good at soccer. Wanna hear a funnier joke? Your Mom Wanna hear the funniest joke?

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whats the difference between a pile of dead babies and a red corvette? i don't have a red corvette in my garage

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Why was the pig squealing? Because all four of its legs were tied together and it was about to have it's head chopped off so the meat could be processed for people to enjoy.

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Q: what comes after 69? A: 70

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a group of jews went to a factory to apply for jobs. Only one came out.

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I took my blind grandmother to the art gallary

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Morning wood.

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Two men are walking along the Great Wall of China. "Do you know how many years it took to build this?" one man asked. "Yes," the other replied. "Me too."

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How many dead babies can you fit a bathtub??? It depends on how you slice them!

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Face...the other white meat!

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How do you kill a blonde? The blonde you were planning on killing, Bridget, arrives home from a rather tiring run. She lets her hair down from her ponytail, and since it is rather long, it brushes against her round breasts. Even though she is a little sweaty, you realize what a beautiful woman she is, and you decide not to kill here. You instead ask her to marry you, and after she replies "yes", with tears of joy streaming down her face, you two make passionate love in the front seat of your 2011 Cadillac Escalade.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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