What do you get when you cross a dog and a school bus? A dog and a school bus are not sexually compatible and therefore they cannot reproduce.

Why did the boy fall off his bike? Because someone threw a fridge at him

What's white and can't climb a tree? A fridge

Roses are red. Violets are blue. THAT'S JUST THE WAY IT IS.

Death by kayak

I was trying to think of a joke to write, but then I became unsatisfied with my creativity and began to spiral into a depressing tangent of thoughts. I just took 37 Ambien, and have approximately ten minutes to live. Instead, I will spend my last moments writing goodbye messages to friends on Facebook and longingly looking at images of the past. Goodbye, world.

What's worse than shitting whilst fucking? Losing your eye! Kelvin Yang

How do two blondes stay alive at the bottom of a pool for 30 minutes? They don't and they died

What is the difference between a pile of dead babies and a Ferrari? I don't have a Ferrari in my garage.

how do make a condom fly around the room? Piss it off!

What happenswhen a geman shepard jumps into a lake? it gets wet

What did the disabled kid get for his birthday. The same as any other kid.

Two drunk drivers got in a car crash They both died

Yo momma so fat she couldn't even fit in a house

Why Johnny's parents threw out his broken bike? - ´Cause Johnny got hitted by a drunken driver and died last week, when he was cycling to school.

What's the difference between a dead dog and a dead black man on the road? One's a dog and one is a man, but more importantly the differences shouldn't be noted in a miserable occasion such as this as both are unfortunate tragedies. Also, one has a big dick.

What's big fat and hairy? Peter

What did the kid with no legs get for Christmas? gloves.

Why do dogs chase squirrels? Beacuse dogs have very low attention spands and also chase cars and cats.

Knock Knock. Hello Frank! How'd you know it was me? There is a window next to the door.

A man is walking down the street and sees a women sat on the pavement crying, he walks over to her and asks "what's wrong?" to which the women replies "it doesn't matter" the women then walks away as she did not want to share private information with a stranger.

Q: How do you turn lights on and off? A: With a switch

What do they call Chinese food in China? Food

Why did the husband and wifes marriage fail? The husband slept with many other women and is putting his family through a hellacious situation.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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