Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? because i shot him. Why did the bird fall out of the tree? he was in front of the monkey

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Q How is it Going Patty? A:Hi Patrick hows it going?

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What did the cow say to the farmer who was driving by in a tractor? MOOOOOOOO!

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In the movie "Sherlock Holmes". Why is Sherlock Holmes gay???? Because he was chasing "Blackwood".

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What did the doctors tell the boy with cancer who is on his way to being released from the hospital? "you are going to die," why give him hope and be proved wrong. This way if they are wrong the whole situation is a miracle, if they are right..... "I told you so"

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Last Christmas I gave you my heart. I am still waiting for a transplant.....

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Why did the parents tell their adopted son to go to bed? He was awake long after he should've been, according to the rules in their household.

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you know what rhymes with sloth. rape

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What's the difference between a 1980 mustang and a pile of dead babies? I don't have the mustang in my garage.

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What rhymes with ten? Rape..... What rhymes with boat? Float.....

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Butterfly is standing on a flower. Cow comes and steps on that flower

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How do you stop someone from getting cancer? Kill them.

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A young man was lost wandering in a field, when he came upon a small house. He knocked on the door and was greeted by a scary southern man with a shotgun in hands. "I'm lost," said the man. "Can you put me up for the night?" "Certainly," the man said, "but on one condition. If you so much as lay a finger on my daughter, I will shoot you with this shotgun." He couldn't have sex with the daughter because he has severe erectile dysfunction.

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why did a girl walk down the alley? because her name was alley!

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You know you guys are suppose to post jokes, not basketball comments.

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roses are red you are dumb no one will care when you die

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Why do elephants have such big ears? So they can hear really well.

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Evidently, in order to get any person of an object (most notably a swing) you must hit them with some form of large and/or sharp object.

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Why is Joe is ugly? I dont Know

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What was the only animal to not board the ark in pairs? Loads of animals because it didn't happen.

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What sits in the corner of a room and gets smaller and smaller? A baby combing it's hair with a potato peeler.

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2001, 2 airplains fly into the world trait centers. the pilots then had their licences taken away.

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Whats worse than the Holocaust? reading posts on this website that arent antijokes. Seriously poeople... you cant just say something that random than put something tragic. it has to be funny and tragic.

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Why is Ian's name Ian? Because he was adopted

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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