Magic! Well not really, you see, people that are stressed have the tendency to remain far longer into the state of hypnosis because their body conciously and subconciously (I am typoing it, but I cant bother to type it correctly fuck it) seek out the state of peace that hypnosis gives more often. Anyway, I know another thing that helps relieve stress, cough... Now, did you know that if you push your nose upwards slightly, you will feel a finger between your legs? its because nerve endings are connected that way, give it a go.

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What's the difference between an alligator and an argyle sweater? There are far too many conceivable differences between the two objects to be able to give an actual definite variance between them.

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I fear I do, maybe someone fooled you, but that was originally one of my aliases.

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Your mom is so stupid that she failed out of high school and now has two jobs to support her family.

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What do you call someone who doesn't have a soul? A ginger

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Q: What was the name of the armless elf in Snow White? A: Stumpy

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Why wasn't the woman happy when she gave birth? Because she was thrown into a pool of semen 9 months ago.

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A Jew walked into a bar and his cat died of aids

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Why did the baby cry? Because he fell off a refrigerator.

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Why did little Lynn fall of her bike? Because she has no legs.

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A black man walks into a bar. "Ouch!" He says as the Klu Klux Klan beat him with sticks

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What did the blind man say to the fish store owner? I would, 1 fish please.

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can the real slim shady please stand up? no. there is a slim shady in all of us, so we will all stand up.

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84.52% of users disapprove of your post, plus or minus 3%.

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Why didn't suzzana go to school on Monday?? Because it was Sunday...I lied about it being monday

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Micheal Curran...that is all.

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Q:Why did the retarded student get called down to the office? A:Because both his parents died in a car accident.

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How do you get a blonde's number? You ask her, but she probably won't give it to a loser like you.

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You walk into a plane full of Arabs talking about how much they hate America. You arrive at your destination enlightened about the problems in American society.

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why am I a hobo? because I lost my job.

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If it looks like grass, smells like grass, and tastes like grass... Then you were honestly misled when ordering that salad.

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How did the baby die? In a very sad and tragic car accident.

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What happens when an alien touches fire? It gets burnt

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whats harder than nailing a dead baby to a tree? my dick wile i do it

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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