Why did the crossing guard drop his whistle? Because a kid got hit by a passing elephant.

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What's the difference between a Ferrari and 50 dead babies? Where the hell would you even find 50 dead babies? That would be really disturbing.

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Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding a baby in your closet.

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What is the difference between an anti-joke and a joke? The word anti before anti-joke.

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Violence is never the answer, its the question... The answer is YES!

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A man walks into a bar. The bartender says "why the long face?" He says, "I have acromegaly"

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sex with dead people. they can't say no;)

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why was the teenage girl crying? She was molested as a child

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Why did Phil Krahn cross the road? Because he is gay

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The game.

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A horse walks into a bar and the barman asks: "why the long face?" The horse, being a horse and thus being incapable of comprehending the complexities of conversation said nothing, and shit all over the floor.

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What is big has a red nose and is funny Don't ask me I have never been out of my house

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A man walks into a bar. He orders a Guinness.

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did you know towels can cause dry skin?

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Harry to Voldemort: Your mother is so fat, her patronus is a cake!

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A catholic priest gets a nun pregnant. He drowns the baby several months later.

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A man walked into a bar. Ouch! He tripped over the little step at the entrance. But don't worry, he's not hurt, it just startled him for a second there. They should put a caution sign out front, somebody might get a serious injury. You can never be too safe, after all.

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A white man, a black man and an asian walked into a bar. They got a drink and discussed multiple issues of the day and then went their seperate ways home.

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Why did Mary fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock, knock? Who's there? Not Mary.

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A man walked in the kitchen with a gun. He made a sandwich.

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A man found out that he had hit the lottery and would be receiving 300 million dollars, but he had to fly to china to do so. The man took a plane to China from New York and would arrive within the next several hours. Meanwhile, in australia a god-cow was producing infinitely large amounts of concentrated milk. His milk was so infinitely large in mass that it collapsed on its own mass and turned into black hole; absorbing the entire Earth. The man never got to receive his money from winning the lottery

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What do you call a lesbian eskimo? The name she was given at birth.

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Hey man. what? squidbillies.

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why does horse head huffer keep posting here? because he really doesn't understand the concept.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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