Why dd the little girl drop her ice cream cone? She lost her arms to cancer.

if you have 5 oranges and 15 ice cubes, how many pancakes can you fit on the roof? red, because aliens dont wear shirts.

What didn't the man piss on the dead baby? Because that is just morally wrong. Instead, he reported it to the police and aided the cause of justice.

ROSES ARE RED VIOLETS ARE BOOBS BOOBS BOOBS BOOBS BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOBSSSSSSSS!

Have you ever had Ethiopian food? ...Neither have they.

why is six afraid of seven? Because seven is a rapist

roses are red violets are twisted turn around bitch your about to get fisted

A white man got injected by Heroin at a party and got instantly addicted.

Why was billy sad? He was being brutally hacked to peices behind his garage

What did the man say to his wife. Hi

how does hitler drink soup ? with a spoon

A brunette, a redhead, and a blonde go on vacation in Hawaii. They plan to swim to the next island. The brunette and redhead do it with no problem. The blonde swims halfway and realizes she is tired. She continues to swim straight ahead knowing her friends are already at the next island.

Barack Obama and a kangaroo pull up to a gas station. The gas station attendant takes one look at the kangaroo and says, "You know, we don't get many kangaroos here." Barack Obama replies, "At these prices, I'm not surprised. That's why we need to reduce our dependence on foreign oil."

How did the weak old man with cancer beat it? He hung himself.

So a man walking down a nature trail came across an injured fox laying on the ground in pain, it looked like it was attacked recently. There wasn't much the man could do at the time, so he gently picked up the fox and rushed the fox to his house. The man arrives moments later at his house with the fox. There were a lot of options the man could choose, but he went with a simple recipe. The man grabbed a knife and gutted the fox, removing all unnecessary organs. He then skinned the fox of it's fur. He sliced the head off, cut the legs to a stub, and stuffed it. He gave it a nice seasoning and placed it in the oven at about 350F for 6 hours. When the fox was perfectly cooked, it was taken out of the oven and left to sit for about 5 minutes to cool. He cut a chunk of meat from the dish and sat down to eat. "What a fine meal" the man said.

Roses are red Violets are blue I have a gun Get in the van

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the chicken saw some potential food across the street.

T-mobile girl: Knock knock. Random person 1: Who is it? ...... *next house* T-mobile girl: Knock knock. Random person 2: Who is it? ...... *next house* T-mobile girl: Knock knock. Random person 3: Come in.

whats uglyand cry , and screams mommy ... you after i bitch slap you

What is it about homosexuals that's so gay? What is it about heterosexuals that's so straight? What is it about an apple that's so gay?(Because it's a FRUIT right?) What is it about penises that's so straight?

An old man, and his daughter are walking down the street. They are having a nice time, until the daughter turns around to see the old man lying on the ground in pain because of the crippling arthritis in his back that has caused him agony and discomfort for years.

A black man walks into a bar in Alabama, he then proceeds to have a couple of drinks and leaves.

Dear 6, Please stop hitting on me, I heard you've done some pretty dirty stuff with 9. Sincerely, 7

Why'd the chicken cross the road? It needed excitement in its otherwise mundane lifestyle.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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