What did Goldilocks say to the Three Bears? No one knows. Her remains were discovered three weeks later.

Why was the girl crying? Because I raped her

what did the poor guy get for christmas POVERTY

what's worse than finding a worm in your apple? alot of things, worms don't taste that bad.

What do you call 50 jewish, homeless men peeing into a river? Pollution.

Timmy eats 32 cookies and eats 30 of them. What does he have? Type 2 Diabetes.

How to open an orange? You don't you peal it

Why couldn't the dinosaur sing? Because dinosaurs are extinct

Knock knock. ... ... *after waiting 30 seconds or so to no answer, the knocker concludes there is no one home and decides to go home to take his son to soccer practice and work on his taxes, and maybe call his mother to see how her foot surgery went* Who's there? Oh.. This is awkward, I forgot why I was here in the first place. I have to go. Bye.

Q: What do you call a blonde that just bought a new car? A: Carol

You're Mom is Dead She was killed by a Grammer Nazi for me misspelling Your

What's black and hanging on a tree in my backyard? Blackberries.

A mass murderer ran into a bar full of people. He first shot a man. What did the man say when the murderer shot him? Nothing, he was hit in the head and instantly died before he could say anything.

Your mother is so fat, she is dying due to obesity and it would be utterly disgusting to make fun of anyone in that situation.

Why did the man walk up to a bank teller with a gun? He is the security guard; he wanted to ask her for financial advice.

What's the difference between Wayne Gretzky and Courtney Love? They have different proffesions

What did the Chinese guy say to the black guy? Nothing, the black guy dosen't speak chinese.

What colour is chocolate? Brown.

What do you call a tree that grew in the middle of a road? Whatever type of tree it was.

Q: How many dead babies can you fit into a bathtub? A: Depends on the size of the tub and the size of the babies.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, the holocaust didn't actually happen, besides I hate jews

Knock knock. "Whose there?" "Dave" Oh alright Dave, two seconds I have got to unlock the door~looks for and finds keys and unlocks door~ Hello Dave, sorry mate not been out yet so not been out, come in.........

whats worse than being payton johnson being black

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I hate you, Go die in a hole.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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