Q: What's brown and sticky? A: Feces

How did the fat guy survive the plane crash? Because he still in the food court at the airport.

Q: What did the duck say to the other duck? A: Quack

What does an otter and a pencil sharpener have in common? They both feature in this joke

why did the girl ask for food? because she was hungry and hadnt eaten in days.

Gandalf and Dumbledore had a son, her name wasn't.

Roses are red violets are blue I'm gonna rape you with a stick

What did the raped girl say to the doctor? Nothing she was dead on arrival.

knock knock whose there? my penis.

Why are large breasts so awesome? Cleavage is sexually attractive to both men and women

What happens when you give a fat man scissors? He cuts off the foreskin of your penis.

Q: What did the black man say to the other black man? A: Nothing. They didn't know each other.

A man walks into a bar He's an alcoholic and it's ruining his family

Why did the girl fall off the swing? She had no arms.

What did the boy with no arms and legs get for christmas? Nothing his parents died in a tragic car accident the night before

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What's white and sticky? A marshmellow.

What's brown and liquidy? Brown paint.

My mom told me and my brother to clean up o te commercial...but we were watching Netflix

Why doesn't Michael Jackson play with my brother anymore? Because he's dead.

Why can't Chuck Norris divide by zero? Because it is impossible, the answer is undefined.

Knock knock Who's there? No one, you have no friends.

A Christian and an Atheist are in a bar, the Christian turns to the Atheist and says "If you don't believe in god you will go to hell." The Atheist replies "Your Mom doesn't believe in god." And then turns around to order another drink.

you need 2 pple for this. Ask me if im a tree? Are you a tree? no

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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