Hey I just met you, and your f$#king crazy,I ate your pizza, so go get me another one!!

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Roses are red, Violets are blue. I'm locked in someone's basement, Please help me.

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Two men walk into a bar. Realizing that they aren't alcoholics and don't drink, they walk back out.

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Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread.

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why did the chicken cross the road because on the other side his wife that he had loved for years was being tortured and he was trying to save her life.

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How much wood could a wood chuck chuck if a wood chuck could chuck wood? Probably 5

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Who should you call when your dad overdoses on Viagra. Child Support

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What's up? Well it all depends on your current position, if you are in the center of the Earth then everything would be up. In space there is no gravity so nothing is up. If you don't understand this the sky is up.

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Why did the guy die? He had a fatal heart attack.

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If your Uncle Jack helped you off an elephant, would you help your Uncle jackoff an elephant? Probably not because it would take more than 3 hands to jack off an elephant P.S. Your Uncle Jack only has 1 hand. Your uncle was on a swing and a clown cut off his hand with an ax

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you're so stupid, you have trouble understanding what you read, like the newspaper, for example

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What do you say to somebody that wont shut up Shut up!!!!

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what did the dog say to the muppet? WOOF

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How do you get a camel out of a desert? a helicopter

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A man walks into a bar...so what? People do it all the time.

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Why did the Chicken cross the road? Because as an animal with legs it is highly capable of doing such as it pleases.

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An Englishman walks into a bar.

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Johnny: One day dad i will be tall like you! (Later that day johnny was found dead in a garbage bag)

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What is the difference between a black man and a pepperoni pizza? One can actually feed a family of 4.

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Three construction workers, an Italian guy, a Mexican guy, and a American guy are sitting on top of a building eating lunch. The Italian is tired of eating meatballs, the Mexican is eating a burrito, and the American is eating a cheeseburger. They are all fed up with eating the same lunch every day. The next day they all jump off the building for unrelated reasons. It is a tragedy and their families mourn the loss.

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I got 99 problems, and most of them involve my terminal illness.

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When life gives you lemons, take them. Free stuff is cool.

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how did the little black boy cross the river? he walked over the bridge.

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Hi, my name is Jake.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops