A rabbi and priest both go into a bar... and they each had a responsible number of drinks before walking home.

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Knock Knock Who's there??? Your mom

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Q: What's multicoloured and spins around while screaming in agony? A: A clown in a washing machine.

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A white man a black man a french man and a mexican are on a sinking ship. The French man says "we have too many of these" and throws a bunch of begets over board. The Black man says "we have too many of these" and throws a bunch of red hot cheetos overboard The Mexican man says "we have too many of these" and throws a bunch of Tacos over board. And then the White man says "we have too many of these" and throws the Mexican man overboard

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Your momma so fat when she went to the beach she was to self concious and left her shirt on.

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God saw himself. Finally, proof.

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YEAH THEY DO!

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What is the difference between a black person and a bicycle? You can sell a bicycle legally.

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What do you do if you walk in on your wife atempting to hang herself in the living room? Ask her to leave the living room, as it would be ironic.

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What did the Rose Bowl say to the Fiesta Bowl? We crushed the Orange Bowl.

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Why didn't the octopus have any friends? Because they are antisocial creatures by nature. -Louis

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What is the difference between and Jew and a Boy Scout? The Boy Scout comes back from camp.

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What do you call a Mexican playing basketball? A man of hispanic heritage that enjoys the sport of basketball.

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Why did the boy cry when he got a new puppy? Because he had anal seepage coming out his ass

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Why was the truck making noises? It was backing up.

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Why couldn't the baby play with the blocks? It died during birth.

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I like peanuts. I like peanuts. I like peanuts. I'm allergic to peanuts. DAMIT

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Who should you call when your dad overdoses on Viagra. Child Support

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Q. Why was the boy depressed? A. Because he lives in a world where apparently all girls are right.

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How many dead babies can you fit in a bathtub? Why are you asking me this question? That's awful and you should be ashamed of yourself.

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Why did the semen cross the road? Because i put on the wrong socks this morning

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I was trying to think of a joke to write, but then I became unsatisfied with my creativity and began to spiral into a depressing tangent of thoughts. I just took 37 Ambien, and have approximately ten minutes to live. Instead, I will spend my last moments writing goodbye messages to friends on Facebook and longingly looking at images of the past. Goodbye, world.

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What has two legs and is red all over? Half a cat.

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What did the piano say to the ice cube? Dude, get back in the freezer or you are going to melt!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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