What did the scarf say to the hat? Nothing, a scarf can't talk.

Its true... Chuck Norris has no hair on his balls. Because hair doesnt grow on steel.

Your mamma's so fat she has been called morbitally obese

What do you call a man with no arms or legs floating in the ocean? Bob. What do you call a man with no arms or legs in front of your door? Matt. What do you call a man with no arms or legs hanging on your wall? Art.

A redundant man walked into a bar. He sat down, and unfortunately, we learn 5 minutes later that his wife died.

whats white and big and white? alot of things...

Q: Wy did the Araib cross the road? A: To open another gas station.

Why did the airplane crash? A loaf of bread was the pilot.

Why is josh such a retard Because when he was born a brick fell on his head.

There are 4 people in a crashing plane, but there are only 3 parachutes. But, the teenage girl says she is depressed and cannot go on. The older woman breaks down into tears because she is reminded of her rough child hood. The two 21 year old twins start crying, too, because they were corrupted by their alcoholic father who would come home and abuse their family. As they were all crying, the two pilots and the flight attendant took the parachutes and jumped. The older woman realized she went to flight school when she was young so she took control. They were are happy and drank a little bit too much alcohol and got drunk. The pilot also drunk and crashed into a huge skyscraper. This catastrophe was later named 9/11.

Little Jack Horner sat in a corner eating a Christmas pie. He died the next morning because it was Easter and the pie had remained unrefrigerated since the holidays. His parents were brought up on charges of neglegent homocide. Plus, they had a meth lab in the guest bathroom and ran a prostituion ring off of Craig's list. Jack's sister is now in the care of loving foster parents,who plan on adopting her and she misses her brother. Easter is a sad reminder of her former life, even though she is now a devout Christian and acknowledges the day as that of our Lord's ressurection. She plans on going to college to study nursing, someday.

A man walks into a bar, he is then escorted to the hospital as a result of brain trauma.

whats black and has many friends? a kind sociable black person

Roses are red. Violets are black. Why is your chest, As flat as my back?

Why did the plane crash? The pilot was a loaf of bread.

What did taxi driver say to the passenger? Where to, sir?

Why did the chicken cross the road? He was depressed for a long time and decided to end his life by getting hit by a car.

Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread.

Why did the man with brain cancer die? He drove his Segway off a cliff.

how do u drown a blond you put a scratch and sniff sticker at the bottom of a pool.

why did the girl cry while watching starwars? She was being raped

The man was allergic to water. He unfortunately died because water is needed to sustain health as a human.

Q: What's the difference between between basketballs and babies? A: I don't shoot basketballs.

Whats black and yellow and makes you laugh? A bus full of niggers driving of a cliff

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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