Why was little Jimmy sad? Multiple complications including broken bones, a fractured skull, liver disease, and the fact that all his family had been gassed by the Nazis.

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"Knock knock." "No."

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There was once a man named Larry. Larry was an office worker for a paper company. One day when Larry was counting papers he got a papercut on his left hand. Therefore his finger began to bleed as he sat in agony. What did Larry do next? He got up and got a band-aid. Larry continued his paper work at his desk.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? I wouldn't consider Mark a chicken. In fact, given the high speed and volume of cars traversing that particular road in both directions, I'd say it was a ballsy move. In hindsight, though, he probably should have waited for the "walk" symbol to appear for pedestrians, in order to avoid being run over by a bus. Anyway, if Pastor John would like to say a few words before we finally put Mark's body to rest...

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So an irishmen, jewish, and asain walk into the bar...and the bartender said get out..

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Why did the boy lick the window? He had Down's syndrome

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In soviet russia, the cow milks you!

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A pirate walks into a doctors office with ship's wheel attached to his crotch. Pirate: "Arrrrrr, do ya accept Kaiser Permanente?" Doctor: "Yes, but there's a $20 co-pay."

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How do you pacify Hitler? Give him jews.

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A Christian and an Atheist are sitting next to each other in a bar. C: Sad you don't believe in God, 'cuz you'll go to hell after your death. A:I don't believe in hell neither..

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Two nerds walk into a bar. The effects of alcohol do not discriminate based upon the social status of said consumer.

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What is Mary short for? She has no legs.

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.......ah shit i forgotten the joke

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Q.What's green and smells like grass??? A. Grass

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Why did Elliot Spitzer cross the road? To go have sex with a hooker.

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What did the down syndrome girl get for christmas? Cancer.

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What did the boy born with cancer get for christmas? ... More cancer

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Why are you on anti joke? Because your not funny enough to make your own jokes

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If humans say YOLO what do cats say? meow.

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What are astronauts called in Soviet Russia? Cosmonauts

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Do you know what my Granddad said to me before he kicked the bucket? He said; how far do you think I could kick this bucket? Then he died.

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How much does the Holo cost? Six million.

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If the camel has seven toes and the armadillo has thirteen, why does your mom pleasure herself to a picture of George Clooney ?

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Q: Why do Indians smell? A: Cause they have noses? Racist.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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