Q. want to hear a really funny joke? A. Fred Figglie-horn

thumb_up thumb_down +18

What do you call a black woman who had 4 abortions? A Crimestopper

thumb_up thumb_down +18

I asked a girl on a date. She said no.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

Knock Knock Who's There The police, your under arrest.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

What's long and black? A 12 inch black dick.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

Knock knock. Whose there? Orange. Orange who? NOTHING, because NOTHING rhymes with orange!

thumb_up thumb_down +18

Yo mama is so fat when she went to the fat contest they said SORRY no pros alowed

thumb_up thumb_down +18

So a man walks into a bar… and gets a bad bruise and a big bump.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

what do you call the man making meth in his basement? the police to stop inappropriate behavior from reaching the children of society.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

Q: A blonde, a red-head, and a brunette all jump off the bridge at the same time. Who hits the ground first? A: As stated by Sir Isaac Newton's third law of gravitation, all three fall to their deaths at the exact same time because the velocity of a falling object is unaffected by the mass of that object... or their hair colour. Idiot.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

What did the teacher say to the boy whose dog had just died? Haha, your dog just died.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

If a banana is a vegetable, how come your mother gets confused when I stick pretzels in my butthole?

thumb_up thumb_down +18

How many babies does it take to paint a house? It depends on how hard you throw them.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

you wanna hear a good anti joke?, so do i

thumb_up thumb_down +18

Why can't Helen Keller drive? because she's a woman

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Why couldn't Little Johnny read his 3rd grade novel? His was repeatedly stabbed in his eyes.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

What's the difference between a snake, and a lawyer? A snake cannot comprehend law, nor can one attend law school and set up an office. They are also different species.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Why couldn't the kid get in to see the pirate movie? It was rated PG-13, and he was only 11. Plus, he had no money, and his mother didn't want him watching movies like that.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Q: How many jews can you fit in a car A: 2 in the front. 3 in the back and as many as you want in the ash tray.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Why did the girl cry? i took her happy meal.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

pleas help someone is in my house i think hes trying to kill me i'm not even joking.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

An owl and a squirrel are sitting in a tree, watching a farmer go by. The owl turns to the squirrel and says nothing, because owls can't talk. The owl then eats the squirrel because it's a bird of prey. Posted by: BerserkSpoon

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Man 1: Do you want to hear a joke? Man 2: Sure. Man 1: Okay.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Why did the plane crash? The pilot was a loaf of bread.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops