sfdg

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J- Jiggly E- Enormous S- Sad S- Smelly E- Ethiopian

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Two ladies are walking down a road. One says, "It's freezing out here!" and then the other woman, who is a scientist, says "No it's not freezing. The freezing point of oxygen is -365.82 degrees F. So, unless it is actually that temperature outdoors, I highly doubt that it is freezing outside."

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Why didn't Sarah come to school today? She had a heart attack and died.

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roses are red violets are blue no seriously they are

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You still alive? I used to be called proteus by the way, but then you disappeared and Neronism or watever its called now turned insane. I mean we killed you man! Out of mercy, you telling me a jacket changed you and everything? Where have you been? Six million followers? And all the shit that has made "moral man" the most lauded thing on Horsehead is you? Mind helping me make sense out of all of this?

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Why wasn't Abraham Lincoln a good president? Because he got shot in the head and died.

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What's the difference between a plum and bunny? They're both purple, except the bunny.

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TIMMY

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Why was six afraid of seven? He wasn't. that joke is just a way to convince you that seven is a scary number.

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what is bad about being a black jew? you have to sit in the back of the oven

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What's the difference between a dead dog lying in the middle of the street and a dead black man lying in the middle of the street? The physical differences you would commonly expect to be between a human being and a dog.

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Whats worse than seeing your mom naked. Your dad.

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There once was a man named Steve. One day, Steve stumbled stupidly, shredding his shirt, shoes and shorts and subsequently shocking Susie; a small shy salsa student. When he arrived home, Steve's wife asked "how was your day dear?" Steve panicked at the thought of having to explain this traumatic event, but thankfully he had undergone speech therapy for his lisp.

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A dog walks into a bar. He's a service animal, so this is allowed.

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A man walks into a bar. He I then taken to the hospital for a major head injury.

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A Jew walks into a bar. He immediately turns around and walks out because prices at this particular high end bar are much too high for his liking.

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What’s worse than taking a bite out of your apple and finding a worm? Taking a bite out of your apple and finding half a worm.

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If I have a penny, and I give it to Michael Jackson, What will he do with it? Nothing. He's dead.

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a irish man walks past a bar

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Kim Kardashian and Kanye West are having a baby. Even Stevie Wonder saw that one coming.

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When life gives you lemons, Commit felonies

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Why did the woman leave the kitchen? She didn't, she's a woman.

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A guy walks into a bar

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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