- Anti Joke

What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

I'm dressing up as a shia for halloween

What's the difference between 4 and 6? 2.

Why did Sara fell off her swing? She has no arms. Knock Knock Who's there? Not Sara

What did the Unicorn do with the Portal gun? Nothing. Neither of them are real.

Why was timmy no longer being bullied at school? The rope said it all! Bitch Died HA

Sex positions (and other related things), never took off... 1. The 96 2. The mission (impossible) position. 3. The Tangoers party (swingers? The fack is that?) 4.Nasal. 5. Bed waltz (requires amazing dancing skills and multitasking, now they just call everything for "bed waltz" to show off) 6.Blind Date take uno (hard to find two blind people and make sure they meet each other and have a good time by themselves). 7. GILFS take one (I mean there could be many hot grandmas out there, but "Guns Id Like For Shooting", was not too popular due accidents)

What do you get when you cross a squirrel and lasagna? I don't know,I'm asking you the question.

I used to work at a chemical plant manufacturing hydrochloric acid. I couldn't handle it. One day a container exploded and I got severe chemical burns on my face. The scarring is awful. It has ruined my life.

What's black and white and red all over? A newspaper painted red.

A man with a blue house wears a blue shirt and wears blue jeans. Someone from a red house with a red shirt knocks on his door. He is invited in because they are friends and both have a wonderful time.

Pi and i are having an argument about the state of modern mathematics. Pi goes into a frenzy and i says "be rational". Pi does not realise that i was just being friendly, and so tells him: "get real". [L]

So a guy goes to his doctor because he thinks he has an STD. He asks the doctor "how bad is it doc?" to which the doctor replies "Well, I got the test results and it doesn't look good. You've got chlamydia, gonorrhea, and onomatopoeia. The guy asks "What's onomatopoeia?" The doctor replies "It's exactly what it sounds like"

A black man and his mexican friend walk into a bar. The black man orders a drink and the mexican gets soda. He is the designated driver

What do you call a black guy flying a plane? A pilot.

What do you call a puppy with one eye, one ear, and one leg? An ugly mother f*cker.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

Want more? You might be interested in...

Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops

What's worse than a black guy? Two black guys....and a dead white man.

Q. Whats black and rhymes with Snoop? A. Dr Dre

your a vagina says you, your a booby

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

What did the blonde do when she reached the traffic lights? She stopped, as the lights were red.

what's worse than being chased by a turtle? being chased by an angry turtle